Inner Medly
by Larkawolfgirl
Summary: Various oneshots about different characters inspired by my music on shuffle. Ratings, characters, and pairings listed at the start of each oneshot.
1. Cravings (Vanitas)

Title: Cravings

Song: Craving (I Only Want What I Can't Have) by t.A.T.u.

Vanitas-Focused

Characters: Vanitas, Ventus, Aqua, Terra

Rating: K+

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts of its characters.

Vanitas melded into the wall's very shadow. The room's inhabitants remained oblivious to his presence as they laughed and joked together. Their bright faces sharply contrasted the permanent ugly scowl painted on Vanitas' own. The happiness radiating around the room came close to him but seemed to be blocked by an invisible shield leaving him feeling even more devoid than usual. This feeling of abandon was something that he did not have the luxury of; he remained ever vigilant of his own emotions, reigning in overwhelming feelings into pliable, manipulative ones. He needed to, or else suffer the agonizing effects of the unversed.

He watched as the blue haired woman touched his other half's face gently, a soft smile on her face. She whispered sweetly of his significance, his importance of living causing a sleeping ogre to awaken within in his belly before he quickly smothered it back down to restfulness. He was the shadow, and shadows did not need reassurance of their purpose. They simply existed and fulfilled their overlooked duties. And overlooked he was as Ven's shining eyes swept passed his hiding place to that of his brunette friend. The man replicated the woman's statements handing the boy a wrapped package.

Vanitas tilted his head in contemplation. He heard them mention something called a "birthday." Hah! He wanted to laugh. As if they knew anything about _his _birthday. _He _was the one with memories, the one with a "birthday", even though his individual identity could be said to have a second birthday. He was suddenly filled with envy. He held all that had once been important about the apprentice Ventus. Ven was nothing but the reject leftovers, yet for some reason he felt like the reject. He lived a dismal life, alone, save for the disagreeable Master Xehanort and wretched unversed. He was plagued by his very own loathsome creations and empty to the point of self-hatred.

The woman left returning minutes later with a decorated cake. Ven blushed at the gesture. The friends ate in merriment for about an hour. Finally they bid the boy goodnight leaving his other half alone with the remaining cake.

Vanitas watched his solitary figure and was about to leave himself when the boy whispered, "Would you like some cake?"

Vanitas was so surprised at hearing this that his hold on the darkness lapsed making him clearly visible. Ven started at him waiting for a reply. Vanitas didn't know how the boy had known of his presence, but he would be damned to let him know of this shortcoming. Instead of asking for this information, he sneered at the cake in distaste.

"That cake? No way would I eat that crap!"

Ven looked at him in disappointment. "Do you want to talk?" He seemed to be struggling for a peace offering, which only angered Vanitas further.

"No." The statement was final. He turned forming a portal of darkness. As he slipped into the welcoming darkness he could hear Ven's sad plea. The fact that his departure somehow hurt Ven pleased him, yet that sleeping ogre turned restlessly inside his stomach.


	2. We Are MORE

Title: We Are MORE

Song: We Are…by Dyonisis

Characters: Namine, Ventus, Vanitas, Axel, Riku, Sora, Terra, Kairi, Aqua, Master Xehanort, Marluxia

Pairings: (one-sided and implied) Vanitas/Ventus, Axel/Roxas (and maybe Xion), Riku/Sora

Rating: T

**AN: **Okay, so I wanted to do this song because it seemed like an interesting challenge. If you don't know this song I highly recommend it because I find it very inspirational. Basically the song lists things saying "we are more" than that. What I did was write a section for each of these lines. In addition, I tried to imitate what Uzumaki-sama did in her one intermission chapter of Stygian Solace. I thought the way she connected her scenes was beautifully crafted, but mine turned out much more strained.

"Do it," Marlucia ordered, and she dropped her head, pained. Lifting the power within herself she let the strands of memory reshape and build upon itself until there was no longer a trace of Kairi. She was lost to both boys, lost forever within this castle except for

**The blonde's rapid consciousness**

told him that the shadow creature had finally drifted into slumber. Ventus recoiled at the memory of what had just transpired and the lingering residue upon him. If only he could leave this place, once again feel the sun on his face. He could barely remember the time before endless shadows and horrors.

**This life was a fate that he must accept. **

He started at the renowned winner's stick in his hand. It was such irony. He had won a life of retrospection, an empty chest, and lost attachments. He wished Roxas and Xion had never entered his life, then he wouldn't have begun to dream of the impossible. He was a Nobody, an empty shell of a person.

**It had been stupid to ever hope for more.**

The boy looked so peaceful in his sleeping state that Riku couldn't help envying him. He wished that he could have the same comfort. Not to forget a person, but to forget himself; he wanted so badly to forget his own transgressions, to be able to forgive himself for the horrible things he had done. But there was no waiting chamber to grant him this peace. Instead he had to pay the price for his flaws by living with them. Lifting the piece of black fabric, he vowed to do the only thing he could think of that could begin to alleviate his conscious; he would protect Sora, even if Sora never wanted to see him again. He would live for Sora.

**This was his new purpose.**

He needed to leave. He was done with the people that had killed Xion.

"Roxas wait!"

He spun on his friend who cringed at the hate evident on his face. "You never told me."

"I wanted to, I swear, but Saix said-"

"Saix? Do you listen to everything that your superiors tell you? Would you kill if they told you to?"

A pained look crossed Axel's face at the accusation.

"You already have, haven't you? God, Axel! I thought you were my friend."

"You are." Axel tried to grasp his wrist, but Roxas flung his arm away.

"I may be a Nobody, but I am my own person. I am

**Finished with this brainwashing,**

Master Xehanort moved onto the next stage. "Do not fear the darkness. It is a part of you as much as the light is. Allow it to grow, allow it to guide you." He smiled wickedly as Terra was swayed by his words. The darkness rose within him to a matching level of the light.

_Just a bit more_. "Realize your inhibitions. It cannot guide you at that level."

Without a second thought Terra did as he was instructed, unknowingly pushing his light down to a cramped hovel in his heart. It still beat strongly, but it was subdued by the overwhelming darkness now intruding along side it.

Terra's already distraught face clouded into one of unquelled abhorrence, a golden glit hidden deep within his eyes.

"Very good," he said rubbing his hands together with

**Pleasure**

filled Sora as he felt Riku. It didn't matter that this man looked nothing like him, sounded nothing like him; this was Riku, the Riku that he had searched so hard for. His very best friend. His fellow in crime. His most important person. He had long denied this fact, instead opting for the easier Kairi. Wasn't it more acceptable to have a crush on your female friend than your male friend? And he did like Kairi, he really did, but here, in this moment, he could no longer hold back the emotions that Riku evoked from him. He had been worried about Kairi when she had gone missing, but it had been nothing compared to how he'd fretted about Riku.

Unable to hold back the rush of peace at finding his friend and the new emotions, he cried, the tears streaming down in heavy drops.

"Riku's here." The words were unnecessary. Kairi obviously already knew or else she would not have asked him to take his hand, but the words were important to him. He needed to express his relief. Riku watched with wide

**Eyes **

watched Ven with contempt. "Come on, Ven, you think that Terra gives a shit about you anymore? He has bigger problems to deal with than your pitiful feelings."

"I believe in him. He's not lost yet."

Vanitas shrugged his shoulders leaning further into the wall behind him. "Keep telling yourself that. Won't change anything."

Ventus gripped his hands into fists. "I will save him!" His voice held a firm determination. Vanitas wanted nothing more than to stomp on it until it dissolved into spinelessness.

"Aqua will get there first," he said without a hint of emotion. Ven's lips twisted up into the start of a smile. "And then you will never see them again. Face it Ven, it's over for you."

"Never! I'm done listening to you."

**The boy slammed the door on his way out of the room.**

What had she said? All she'd done was tell him about her little crush. It couldn't be that Riku had a crush on her could it? No, that was crazy! Riku almost never paid any attention to her, so how could he have a crush on her? A stray thought drifted to the forefront of her mind, but she pushed it aside as ridiculous. However, the more she thought about it the more the thought made sense. Riku did always hang out with Sora. He did always give her these strange looks when she touched Sora. And now he was pissed that she had confessed to him.

**It was unbelievable.**

An anvil of emotion nearly crushed him with its intensity as the memories flashed passed his mind too quickly to comprehend, though deep within his subconscious he did.

_A girl faintly smiling as she fades into white blinding light._

_A boy falling from a tower into the void of wind and endlessness._

_A lonely girl drawing people she'd never known._

_A shattered boy just trying to live his life._

Tears pricked Sora's eyes. His heart felt like it had been punched.

"Did you do this? Did you cause all this pain?" Something that had already been pulled within him snapped. He would create happiness for as many people as he could. Everyone deserved happiness. Everyone deserved to live. Everyone deserved individuality.

At this moment the universe rippled.

_A girl smiled while a tear slowly trailed down her face._

_A grim faced man momentarily broke out of his constraints, feeling a surge of peace he had not felt in years._

_A black-clad man was finally rewarded with the keyblade he had strove for._

_A boy smiled gently from within his sleep._

_A mass of shadows swelled with an odd sense of excitement._


	3. Alone Time (Sorikai)

Title: Alone Time

Song: I Think We're Alone Now by The Birthday Massacre

Kind of Riku-Focused

Characters: Kairi, Sora, Riku

Pairing: Riku/Sora/Kairi

Rating: K+

**AN: **Sorry for the wait. I was on a role of writing every day, but then my habit was broke and I had trouble getting back into it. I actually was working on another oneshot before starting this one (which means that I am more than halfway done with the next ). When I started this it wasn't going to be focused on any of them individually, but as I continued Riku kind of took over. For some reason Riku wants to be the star of these oneshots lol.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

The trio had been inseparable ever since they met, hanging on each other at every given moment. As children they had been full of giggles, rolling around in a heap tickling and joking. Their parents encouraged them to play with the other neighborhood kids, and they frequently did, but more often than not the trio would be found alone together. Their parents didn't complain because either way it kept them out of their hands for that much longer, yet as the kids grew their worries grew as well. It was unhealthy for them to be so close. Teens had raging hormones and only had one thing in mind.

Kairi's parents were the worst. It's not that easy having a teenage daughter, with the threat of pregnancy always nodding at the door. Each time they told her to keep some distance between her and the boys she got furious. She couldn't believe that her parents had such little faith in her, especially when it came to her boys. As if she could live without hanging out with them; they were like her family. Each time she'd storm out of the house and go see them, partly out of pure defiance, and partly because they always managed to quickly calm her nerves. Sora would laugh hysterically as if the idea was ridiculous, which earned him a glare from Kairi and a skeptical look from Riku. The elder boy would explain clearly how even if anything did happen it wouldn't be the end of the world, which would make butterflies appear in the girl's heart calming her immediately. This always killed Sora's laughter and he would join them in a knowing smile.

Riku's parents weren't much better. They had high expectations and were anxious for him to date a nice girl. His father even went so far as asking why he still hung out with Sora when he could easily have Kairi for himself. Riku couldn't care less what his assumptions about him and Kairi were, but he couldn't believe he had the audacity to tell him to ditch Sora, his oldest and best friend. Unlike Kairi, he would stay and argue it out, but never to any avail. His parents just couldn't understand why he was so attached to another boy, especially one "competing for the same girl." This was what upset him the most. They didn't know anything! To them it was all about competition; competing for the highest test scores, competing for the most prestigious jobs, competing for the most desirable woman. To them friendship was just a means for climbing the social ladder. What he had with Sora was so much more than that. It wasn't about competition, though in the past they had often competed in fighting skill. After what they had gone through together, fighting against each other, almost losing each other, all competition had fizzled away. Now there was only a strong bond, built out of endless trust and devotion. He would say as much, and when it became apparent that yet again his father was absolutely close-minded on the subject, he would seek refuge in the trio.

Sora had it much easier, having a carefree mother who had taken quite a liking to the other two. While his father still marveled at how close they were to each other, Sora's home was a needed safe haven for them. His mother would always welcome them with a steaming bowl of soap no matter what hour of the night. Even still the constant supervision could be stifling. While the play island was free from adults, it was still frequented by the other teens, namely Tidus, Waka, and Selphie who often went there simply to search them out.

For that reason, the trio often took refuge in the hidden cave; the cave that had once been Riku and Sora's little secret; the cave that had prompted their entire journey. At first Riku had been hesitate to go there. His jealousy over Sora letting Kairi enter had been what began the rise of the darkness within him. It still felt a little irreverent to let her in, but this feeling eased once they had decided to add Riku to the figures portrayed on the cave wall. Another reason Riku had been hesitate to return had been because it reminded of his own flaws. If only he had confronted them with his feelings of jealousy then none of that would have happened. No matter how many times they reassured him that they forgave him, that people change, he would just put on a fake smile.

Regardless, Riku locked these issues of his away in a box so that he could enjoy their time spent alone together. Today was no different. He stood there in the cave, alone for now, awaiting the other two. He stared at the drawing with a real smile spread on his face. Sora's and Kairi's ingenuous faces stared back with humungous grins. Each was holding a paopu fruit out toward the other. But the drawing didn't stop here any longer. Riku's face, with an equally humungous grin floated in the foreground. He was also holding out a paopu fruit, changing the dynamic of the drawing; now it was not a simple back-and-forth exchange, but instead of an indistinguishable transfer. Riku laughed to himself. As much as the artwork put his heart at ease, it was also quite forthright. _What could be taking them? _he wondered. Not long after the two stumbled in noisily giggling.

"Hey," Riku called with a raised hand. They giggled at him in greeting while Kairi shifted the arms hidden behind her back. "What are you guys hiding?" Riku questioned, suspicion evident in his tone.

"Nothing," Sora said coming over to lay an arm across his shoulder.

"Sure." He hugged him back, but didn't take his eyes off of Kairi. When they broke apart she remained standing where she was. He eyed her before approaching her himself. Before he could get too close she backed up with a start. "What's the matter?"

She gave Sora an imploring look, and he nodded to her. Sighing, she brought her hands out in a gesture of offering. They held a yellow star shaped object; a paopu.

Riku could feel his face flushing. "What is- "

"We want to share it with you," Sora said simply.

"You, you do?" His voice was more pleading than he would have liked.

In answer Kairi gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek. "Yep~"

He took the fruit hesitantly taking a small bite. It had a distinct sweet and sour taste that surprisingly quenched the slight thirst he'd had. It was a taste he wouldn't mind getting addicted to. He watched in amazement as the other two also took small bites. Then the fruit reached him again, and he took another bite before passing it along. Together they ate the fruit in a circular fashion until there was nothing left but stray juice clinging to their jaws and hands.

"You missed some." Sora leaned in licking some juice off of Riku's chin. Kairi laughed at the shocked look that resulted.

"What are you doing?"

"Relax, Mr. serious. We kind of did just marry each other," she said flippantly.

"No we didn't." He blinked in confusion.

"Oh, yeah sorry. Just intertwined our fates for the rest of our lives, maybe even longer." She narrowed her eyes. "Same thing." Then as if for emphasis she kissed him full on the mouth. Giving in he encircled her waist holding her close.

"Hey, don't forget about me!" Sora demanded stomping his foot with a pouting face.

She chuckled kissing him next, then she gave Riku a look, and he knew what it meant. He kissed Sora, ignoring the gleeful clapping.

"I now pronounce us man, man, and wife," she bellowed in mock seriousness.

"I do," Riku said taking ahold of each of their hands.

"Good. Otherwise I'd just beat your butt until you came to your senses," the younger boy stated.

"As if you could."

"Dare you." Sora crossed his arms.

"You bet."

Kairi watched as they started to run out of the cave. "Hey, wait! I wanna fight too!" She quickly took off after them.


	4. Shattered Hopes (Namine)

Title: Shattered Hopes

Song: Fearless by Falling Up

Namine-Focused

Characters: Namine, Sora, Kairi, Riku

Pairings: Sora/Namine, Sora/Kairi

Rating: T

**AN: **I finished them both today. Aren't you proud?

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

I had never meant any harm. Trapped in this castle of endless white there wasn't much left for me to do. It was a boring existence. The only delight in my life were the simple, yet intriguing, memories of a boy I had never met. I may not have met him, but I knew him better than anyone. I knew his hope and dreams, his fears, his insecurities. I even knew more about him than he did. I could see the boy sleeping within him undetected and the other off learning about the world. Whenever I wished I could play any said memory as if it were a movie in my head. I often bemused myself trying to convey important memories onto paper, though to be honest, I wasn't too great of an artist. Numerous childlike drawings littered my white room, splashing it with much needed color.

The isolation wouldn't have been so bad if not for the pressure those few black-clad Nobodies subjected me to. At first I tried not to listen to them. I didn't want to mess with Sora, I didn't want to hurt him. He was my only solace. He held a light that was somehow absent from this blindingly-white castle. They didn't take my refusals well. It depended on who happened to be in charge of watching me what my punishment entailed. Sometimes I was beaten, other times withheld food, and often I was locked up. I must admit that I am a weak person. These punishments together with my already flimsy inclination easily broke my resolution.

The first time I messed with his memories was when he entered the castle. They wouldn't stand for missing out on a chance like him coming right to them of his own volition. Marluxia pulled on my hair forcing my eyes up to meet his.

"Do it." His voice was dead serious. I closed my eyes, but he spat the order again.

The walls fell, and I found myself inside Sora's memories. Each piece of the memory was connected by a strand to other pieces and memories. With the simple flick of my imaginary scissors any strand I wanted could be cut away, and the memory would ripple as it reshaped itself.

I was supposed to remove Kairi, Sora's motivation, but when I saw the way he looked at her, the way he felt for her, I stopped. I couldn't help the envious feeling that filled me. This was something I longed for, to have someone, anyone, want me this much. What I would give to have anyone want me at all. It was ridiculous. Kairi _was _me, yet it was still true that Sora wanted her, not me. Regardless, this was as close as I could get, and I couldn't bring myself to erase it.

Then a despicable thought planted a seed in my mind. What if I could fulfill Marluxia's wish and mine at the same time? What if Sora did want me instead of Kairi? I knew what I was doing was wrong, but it didn't stop me. I cut the strands tying the core of Kairi's existence from the center of his heart itself. As the space surrounding me began to ripple I formed an image of myself in my mind. I saw myself handing Sora a yellow starfruit, us exchanging smiles. Tiny tears trickled in my eyes at the feeling that filled me as the alternated memory became real for me as well. If only this could be true.

Marluxia brought me out of the spell by pulling on my hair yet again.

"Aren't you done yet, bitch?"

Solemnly, I nodded, trying my best to hide the unshed tears. He either didn't notice or didn't care in his excitement to implement his plan. I watched as he exited my prison cell. The full impact of my actions now rested on my shoulders. Whatever harm came to him now was my fault.

This was the moment of choice. I needed to reap the fruits of my folly. I turned around, unable to face him.

"Sora, you have a choice. You can lose your memories of this castle and reclaim your old ones, or keep your memories here and give up the memories you've lost."

"Do I have to-to choose?"

"Yes." The time before he answered felt like an eternity.

"Make me like I was."

My face contorted tears threatening, but I resolved myself with a fake smile before turning back to face him. "Oh, okay. Nobody needs to keep a bunch of memories that aren't real, right?" I could feel a cool hand creaking around my heart. "You want to remember all of the people who are really important to you. Anybody would choose that." I blinked the tears back as I led him to the sleeping chamber.

"All of this may have started with a lie, but I really am glad that I could meet you Sora." And it was the truth. Even though I was losing him, I reminded myself that this was still better than I had started out. I was no longer a prisoner, and at least I knew that Sora didn't hate me.

"Yeah, me too. When I'd finally found you, and even when I remembered your name, I was happy. The way I felt then that was no lie." The hand around my heart disappeared. He did feel something for me. Maybe it wasn't the same, or even as strong, as what he felt for Kairi, but it was for me and me alone.

"Goodbye." I waved sincerely.

"No, not goodbye. When I wake up I'll find you and then they're be no lies. We're gonna be friends for real. Promise me, Namine."

It was too much to wish for. "You're going to forget making that promise."

"If the chain of memories comes apart the links will still be there, right? So, the memory of our promise will always be inside me somewhere. I'm sure of it."

"Yeah, you're right. Okay, it's a promise."

"Good. Until later."

I watched as the sleeping chamber closed obstructing my view of him, but I knew that someday, somehow that promise would be fulfilled.


	5. Imitator (Ven)

Title: Imitator

Song: Pale by The Birthday Massacre

Ventus-Focused

Characters: Ventus, Vanitas, Terra

Pairings: Vanitas/Ventus, (one-sided) Terra/Ventus, Terra/Aqua

Rating: M

**AN: **RATED FOR LEMON. I did not know how to end this, so I greatly apologize if it seems OOC, rushed, or just plain crappy. Up until that point I thought it was pretty good. Also, just a side note, the title fit better with my original plan (which morphed), but I didn't want to change it.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

Ventus awoke with a flourish. Today was the day that he would muster up his courage to confess. Since today was Valentine's it was the perfect opportunity. He picked his outfit meticulously; he needed to look his best. Finally satisfied with his appearance, he opened the window, taking a whiff of the constant springtime breeze. Drifting voices caught his surprise.

"Terra? Yes, of course. Of course I do." That was Aqua. Curious, Ven scanned the ground below finding Terra and Aqua standing close together. He was holding a wrapped package, and her smile was an unfamiliar one. As he watched she wiped her eyes before hugging him tightly, Ven's heart clenched, but he kept watching. Terra pulled her to him before pushing her back just enough to kiss her.

Ven spun around throwing the window shut hastily. This couldn't be happening. They had known each other way before he had ever come to live with them, but he had thought that he and Terra shared something. Apparently it had been entirely one-sided. He slid his way to the floor, letting his legs sprawl out to the sides, a dead look in his eyes. He wasn't sure what to do now. He didn't feel up to facing them just yet. His stomach protested loudly, but he refused to budge.

A pounding came to his door some time later.

"Hey, Ven, are you alright in there?" Aqua sounded worried.

"I'm fine," he lied through gritted teeth.

"You sure? You must be getting hungry."

"Just leave me alone." A shuffling sound suggested that she had backed up in surprise at his biting tone.

"Okay, then." Her voice was mournful. "Just let me know if you need anything."

She was gone.

Crawling up on stiff limbs, he decided to try to go back to sleep. At least in sleep he could forget any of this had happened.

He was woken by a snort.

"Heartbroken, Ventus?" The voice was laced with vile. When Ven didn't answer the intruder continued. "Come on, Ven. I came all this way to visit. The least you can do is talk to me."

Ventus glared at him, not in the mood. "Go away."

"That's not very nice. I'm not the one who broke your heart." A wicked smile accompanied the statement. "It was bound to happen eventually. Did you really think that he would go for someone like you? Someone so very young and naïve? Face it, you're like a little brother to him."

"Shut up." Vanitas' smile widened. It wasn't often that Ven got this upset.

"It's only the truth." He waved his hand submissively.

"Why are you here?" Ven glared suspiciously.

"Just checking up on you."

"As if you care."

"Oh, but I do. Seeing you suffer always makes my day."

Vanitas brushed his cheek with mock affection, and Ventus shivered at the contact. That was something he had always imagined Terra doing. As much as he despised Vanitas, especially now, he couldn't deny that his body sought that comfort.

"At least one of us is happy." He pushed the hand away, unwilling to let Vanitas know how it was affecting him.

"What's so great about him anyway? That pansy can't even tell that he's being played like a fool."

"Don't you dare bad mouth him." Ventus shot out of the bed, fists clenched. Vanitas remained unfazed.

"It's only the truth. Master Xehanort has him around his thumb, and none of you can even tell."

"Master Xehanort?" Ventus stopped to think about it and realized that Vanitas might be right. Xehanort was the one pushing Terra to the extreme, the one telling him that he needed to improve himself. Could it all just be for his own benefit?

Vanitas laughed at his shocked expression. "You guys are priceless."

Ventus huffed in indignation. "It doesn't matter. He is a great person. He is kind and generous. He may not belief in himself, but I do. He is strong and trusting."

"And good in bed," Vanitas added.

Pink touched the blond's face at the imagery now in his mind. "That-that has nothing to do with it."

"Really? So, you never touched yourself," Vanitas brushed the boy's cheek again, "while thinking of him?" Ven didn't try to the hide the shiver that ran through him this time. "Did you imagine him licking you?" Vanitas leaned in licking along his jaw. "Him sucking you dry?"

He took his mouth in a hard kiss. At first the blond tried to pull away, but the feeling nearly swept him away. It was rough, wet, and consuming. All thoughts of Terra disappeared; there was only bodily contact, heat, and desire.

"Make me forget," he ordered.

Vanitas' eyes widened only a fraction displaying obvious amazement. No doubt he had planned to torment Ven further with the kiss, not satisfy him. But then his eyes glazed over with an intent look of desire. He licked his lips as if preparing for a meal before rejoining their lips.

They kissed again and again, pausing only long enough to take small breaths, smacking sounds resonating around them. Hands trailed arms and each other's neck uncontrollably. His darker half pushed him back onto the bed and up against the wall. Ven's movements became more restricted because of the hard surface behind him giving Vanitas more leverage. He slammed into the boy, causing his back to grind into the wall. Ven whimpered slightly but didn't protest, instead his fingers searched around the hem of his skin tight outfit for an open or zipper or something. Finding none he whirled his head to the side and out of Vanitas' immediate range.

"How do you even take that thing off?" His annoyance was evident, and Vanitas' eyes twinkled with mirth.

"Like this." As if by magic the outfit disappeared entirely. The blond started in amazement. "It is just darkness," he explained.

He resumed their kissing, reaching down to the hem of Ven's shirt at the same time. His hands ran under the fabric lifting so as to scrape into the skin there. Taken aback Ven grasped onto his back as well, kneading the flesh with his fingertips. Vanitas lifted the shirt roughly over his head mussing his already sleep-ridden hair.

He brought his mouth down to Ven's neck sucking on it greedily. For a split second feared he may be a vampire of sorts with how hard he was sucking. Blood rushed to the area heating it. He moaned, twisting his head to the side giving him easier access.

Continuing, Vanitas undid the boy's pants and tossed them aside. Then he brought his hands down to his thighs messaging the fatty tissue there. He touched the stiff cock, rubbing the precum down along it. A deep, almost feral sound emitted from Ven's throat at his dick being touched for the first time. It didn't last long, though. Venitas stroked him only long enough to smear his fingers entirely with the precum. Satisfied, he moved his hand lower prodding between the blond's buttcheeks.

"No!" Ven protested halfheartedly. He didn't want his first time to be with this monster, yet he wanted it so bad. He wanted to forget. He wanted to feel comfort in endless heat. He wanted to release the agonizing buildup of emotion and sexual craving. He wanted to be filled up with something beyond himself in hopes that it would fill the void now residing within himself.

Vanitas grunted, pulling Ven down into more of a laying position by his thighs. "Stop."

Vanitas cut him off with yet another kiss. Ven's cry was swallowed as Vanitas stretched him. Three fingers prodded at him before being replaced with a hard appendage.

"Ahh." Vanitas let him break away from the kiss now that his job was complete. His muscles down there were so very tight, and he felt so very strained. Vanitas only waited about a half a second before moving. His movements were fairly slow, but they gradually increased to the point that it made the blond thrash. The discomfort was strong, but it provided Ven with the consuming mind-set he had anticipated.

Vanitas' hands grasped at his buttchecks, nails digging in, most likely leaving marks, but when a certain spot was hit Ven no longer cared what happened to him. All worries were blown away by the explosion lit inside him. He cried out as tears of pleasure prickled at the corners of his eyes.

"Again," he said, and to his surprise, Vanitas complied. He managed to hit the spot with the majority of his trusts, sending Ven into a blissful heaven. Meanwhile, Vanitas peppered his skin with reddening nail scratches.

The boy shuddered feeling his approaching release, but Vanitas beat him to it, filling him with hot liquid. The heat was blinding and served as his final straw. Semen fell upon his stomach and leaked from his hole.

As his high wore off his first thought was how badly he needed a bath. His second thought was that Terra had rejected him. And his third thought was that he had just slept with the enemy. But as he looked over at the dark boy, now laying on his back beside him, he didn't feel like an enemy, only a messed up teen. There wasn't any particular vile visible on his face, only a softened look of satisfaction.

"Thanks," Ven said hesitantly. The word felt awkward, but he didn't know what else to say.

Vanitas rolled over so that he was laying on his side facing him. "As good as you imagined?"

Ven really didn't want to answer that. More like different. In his fantasies Terra had treated him gently, stretching him slowly, whispering loving words, and definitely not scratching him. He glared down at some of the reddening marks. Yet, the aggression had been oddly satisfying. He wasn't about to tell the other boy that, though.

The dark boy smirked. "That good, huh?" Ventus turned his back on him, ashamed that his expression had given him away.

"See who needs old Terra when you got me?" The tone was sarcastic, but it hit something in Ven. He did have Vanitas, for better or worse.

"You're right."

"Huh?" The other boy started in utter shock.

"I guess I don't need him as much as I thought I did."

"You saying you want to fuck me again?" His air of superiority was back in full force.

"Maybe."

"Ooh, little Ven isn't a perfect angel after all. If you want to be a horny rabbit be my guess. Catch ya later then." He redonned his outfit before disappearing into a portal of darkness.

_What did I just get myself into?_ Ven questioned staring at the white liquid still on him. His heart, however, felt lighter.


	6. Tonight (Sora)

Title: Tonight

Song: Hope of Morning by Icon for Hire

Sora's perspective, Riku-Focused

Characters: Riku, Sora, Kairi, Waka, Tidus, Selphie

Pairing: Riku/Sora

Rating: M

**AN: **RATED for LEMON.Hmm..that turned out a bit differently than I thought, but I like it. I just hope that Riku's angst isn't annoying lol.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Kingdom Hearts or any of its characters. If I did then everyone would be happily living together.

"And I was like, 'You can't throw to save your life.' Then when he paused to think about my comment, did I mention that he's an idiot, I shot passed him scoring the winning goal. It was great."

"Wow, Waka. You're pretty cool." Selphie giggled.

"You sure are the man, but just you wait. Next time I'll score the winning goal." Tidus pointed to himself flauntingly making the others laugh. That is, all except for Riku.

Riku sat in the furthest corner of the group and hadn't talked much. Sora was beginning to worry. "Hey, Riku, do you have any weekend stories?"

The oldest teen seemed taken aback by the sudden address. "Not really. I was pretty much with you the entire time, you know."

"Well, yeah, but you still could have done something interesting," Sora said hopefully. He didn't care what Riku said as long as he actually socialized. He had been acting more and more distant lately. When they had first returned from fighting Xehanort he had acted attached just like Sora had anticipated. They had spent such a long time away from their friends and families after all. Yet, after the first few weeks something had come over him, making him shrink back into the background of every situation.

"I did not."

The group fell into an awkward silence as they looked back and forth between Riku and Sora.

Kairi laughed tensely. "I heard a new bakery opened up yesterday. They are having an opening sale. Anyone want to come?"

"Sorry, Kai, we have practice in a bit," Tidus replied.

"I'll come!" Selphie raised her hands in glee.

"Sora? Riku?" Kairi asked tilting her head in slight concern. Riku didn't even meet her eyes.

"Naw. Think I'll stay here. Have fun." Sora smiled, and she waved as the others followed her out of the clubhouse.

With just the two of them alone a heavy silence settled. "So, are you going to tell me what is troubling you or not?"

"What are you talking about?" Riku turned his head away.

"Don't play dumb. Come on, Riku, after everything we've been through, do you seriously not trust me?"

"That has nothing to do with it." He looked at him in astonishment. "Oh course I trust you."

"Then what the hell is the problem? I thought the three of us agreed to try our best to go back to normal? Yet, every time I hang out with you anymore you just sit there. You act like a dormant rock." Sora's restrained anger was beginning to raise.

"It's personal, alright?"

"No. That's not good enough. We've always told each other everything since we were little. That's what best friends do."

A cold chuckled erupted from Riku's throat. "Is that really what you think? I never told you everything. I'm allowed to have my secrets. Not like you don't have any."

Sora winced. Now that he thought about it he hadn't told everything either. There had been Kairi's confession about her personal worries about the older boy, but he had been sworn to secrecy. Besides that, and the minor secret birthday parties, there was only one thing he had ever hid, and that was a very recent secret. With the way Riku was acting Sora didn't feel that he deserved the information.

"Fine whatever. Keep your secrets. Guess we aren't as close as I thought." He turned his back to him fuming. This antisocial asshole was not the Riku he knew.

"Sorry, I didn't mean it that way. It's just that I don't want you to view me differently."

When Sora looked at him again his silver hair (now grown out a bit) fell in his face obstructing his view. "Differently?" He would have added that he was currently thinking of him as a jerk, but he didn't want to ruin the progress he'd made.

"I couldn't stand it if you came to hate me."

"I could never hate you." The statement was so powerful that Riku raised his head to stare into Sora's radiant face. Upon seeing it Riku's eyes scrunched.

Was he fighting back tears? Sora had never seen him cry before. He was unsure of what to do. If he tried to comfort him then Riku might take that as pity. Unsure, he just sat there waiting.

"You might not feel that way if you knew the real me."

"Please stop being cryptic, and just tell me what the deal is!"

The silver haired teen punched the floor causing a rattling sound. "Fine." His tone was oddly soft compared to the rattling. "I can't forgive myself. At first, when we came back I was too happy to think about it. I was just so glad to see that everyone was safe, but then I thought about why they were in danger in the first place."

"Riku-"

"Don't! Don't tell me it wasn't not my fault, because it was. Even if I was confused, they were still my decisions. I still chose to fight you."

"People change. The darkness changed you, but you fought back."

"No, it didn't." Riku turned his head in shame.

"Huh?"

"It didn't change me. Sure it increased the volume, but the thoughts were already there. The darkness only made them more compelling."

"Oh." Sora knitted his fingers. After a lengthy silence he asked, "Do you still have these thoughts?"

"I-" He looked unsure of how to answer. "Sometimes I can still hear them, wisps of promises, of power, of glory, and I worry that they won't ever leave me, at least not completely, but I can tell that they are no longer my thoughts. I would never do those things again."

"Then you have changed. And that's all that matters." Riku looked at his smiling face and half-smiled in return, yet something still seemed to be troubling him.

"Sora, what do you think of me?"

What did he think of him? What sort of question was that? His face heated, and he wondered if now was the right time to divulge his secret. The moment was so serious, and he wasn't sure if his confession was appropriate or not.

"I like you a lot, Riku. You have a weak side that you hardly ever show the world which you cover up with your strong side. I like them both. Your strength means that you _can_ work past whatever weighs you down. Your weakness shows that you do understand the world and its consequences. I only wish that you could let us—me-in more so that I could help you." _Maybe if you had before I could have stopped you_, he added silently.

"Thanks," was the shy response. "It's not so easy, you know. I want to be this strong person. I don't want this weakness."

"But this weakness is a part of you," Sora said with confidence. "It means you're human."

"I want to be better."

"No one is perfect."

"You are."

Sora's heart fluttered. What did he mean by that? "What?"

"Nothing."

"Riku, remember how you said that you haven't told me everything?" Riku nodded. "Well, I haven't told you everything either. I no longer think of you as my best friend. Er, I mean, I don't think of you as _only _my best friend," he hurriedly clarified seeing Riku's fallen face. "You're more than that. What do you think of me?"

Riku shifted unsettled at having the question turned on him. "I don't think of you as only my best friend either." Was Sora imagining the blush on his face?

"What do you mean by that?"

He glared at him in challenge. "What about you?"

The brunet sighed in defeat. "Okay, you win. I like you, like _that._"

The silver haired teen exhaled in relief. "Thank God."

Sora drooped his lips in a pout. "You answer too."

The chuckle he released made the entire encounter worthwhile. Little by little he could cheer him up.

"I like you too." He said it simply as if it was common knowledge.

The air surrounding them changed in that moment. What had been the usual friendly atmosphere, however dampened by angst, prickled with a ridge urgency.

Sora crawled over to the elder teen on his knees and raised his hand to brush through his hair. Riku's hair always tempted him even before he had ever thought of him as more than a friend. It was long and soft, the exact opposite of his own short and prickly mane. It was regretful that he had not gotten the chance to feel his full hair before it was cut, but this was still well worth it. His hair was silky to the touch and shimmed a bit in the last rays of light streaming in through the cracked window. Riku leaned into his hand encouraging him further.

"Riku," he whimpered. Keeping his hand in the treasured hair he cupped his cheek with the other. Bringing his lips in, he initiated their first kiss. It was sweet and slow. Sora moved his lips, but Riku held back reacting only briefly.

"What's worng?" He scrunched his face in confusion.

"We shouldn't"

"Why?"

"Because…I don't deserve you."

"Stop that right now!" He took hold of both of his cheeks forcing him to stare him dead in the eyes. "Do you not realize that hearing those sorts of things hurt me? I love you, you dummy. It doesn't matter rather you deserve me or not. I'm going to give you two options. You can act like a boyfriend should, or I will beat your butt until you do."

"Okay." Riku brought his arms around his lower back holding him close. Sora sighed leaning his head on his shoulder savoring the comfort from the simple act of holding each other.

After a few minutes he reinitiated kissing and was happy that Riku was following his order. He did more than kiss him back, instead pushing with increasing pressure until finally prodding with his tongue. Sora opened his mouth thoughtlessly, and they explored each other's mouths for a while.

With each movement the brunet's mind became hazier. With a moaned "Riku" he pulled them down into a laying position, with Sora on his back. Riku started down at him with apprehension.

"Don't you dare stop."

"But what if I hurt you? What if I-" Sora stopped him with yet another kiss, this time sneaking his hand up and under his T-shirt. He trailed along his back thrilling at the shiver his movements caused.

"Sora." His voice wavered prooving that he was too far to turn back down. _Finally._

Riku reached behind himself guiding Sora's hands in divesting him. Next he shifted so that Sora could remove his own shirt. Bare chest to bare chest, they pressed inflamed skin together reveling in the heat. Sora arched his back in anticipation.

Taking the hint, Riku lowered himself and began to work on lowering his shorts. Sora groaned as Riku grabbed his erection. He covered his face in embarrassment as he felt his face contort. Riku stroked him evenly twisting along the head every so often. The younger teen could feel himself nearing the edge of sweet oblivion, but then shot up.

"Stop!"

Riku blinked in surprise stilling his ministrations obediently.

"What about you?"

"I'm fine." The smile was genuine which made it even worse.

"What am I going to do with you?"

"I'm sorry. I just can't trust myself or convince myself that I deserve this."

Looking around at brilliant thought occurred to Sora. "Do you see the fading light?"

Riku nodded.

"It is the end of one day and the dawn of another. The you of yesterday is gone. This new you is my boyfriend and have done _nothing_ wrong. This is a horny teenager who is allowed to be so." Smiling, he emphasized himself by brushing against his clothed erection with his foot.

Riku's closed his eyes perhaps to resolve himself. Then without further ado he removed his pants. He sucked on two fingers then lowered them to Sora's opening. One pushed in slowly causing Sora to shift in discomfort. He forced himself to relax and soon the second was added.

"I think I'm okay now." He smiled reassuringly, and taking his cock in hand, Riku pushed in.

"Riku!" Sora cried in mixed pleasure and pain. Luckily, Riku seemed to notice the pleasure and didn't stop. He worked into a steady rhythm building up a sweat from the exertion and island heat. A few droplets fell upon Sora's face, but he barely registered them as he shivered in passion.

"I love you," Riku confessed with abandon.

"Me too." Sora pulled him down into a kiss wanting to feel as much contact as he could. He could feel himself getting close again.

"I think I'm gonna cum," he moaned.

"Just…a bit longer."

Sora tried to hold out, but he couldn't for long, and soon both of their stomachs were coated in his semen. Riku pushed in a few more time before cumming himself.

He crumpled down on top of the other boy, and Sora could feel that his body had released more than a bit of tension; it was as if his body was a million times lighter.

"Thank you," Riku whispered.

"For what?"

"For believing in me."

"Dummy. I always have."

"Even when we fought?"

"Always, and nothing will ever change it."

"I really don't deserve you." Seeing Sora's refound glare he continued, "which is why the least I can do is appreciate you."

"You owe me a lot more than just that. At least a hundred more session of this might satisfy me, though." Riku chuckled stroking his prickly hair.


	7. Forever (Axel)

Title: Forever

Song: Paperthin Hymn by Anberlin

Axel-Focused

Characters: Axel, Roxas, Xion

Pairing: Axel/Roxas

Rating: T

**AN: **I can't believe I just wrote that. The saddest of the oneshots so far.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

"_Here," the blond took a bite of the offered ice cream smiling. _

"_It's good. Still not as good as the sea salt, though."_

_Axel chuckled. "Maybe not, but you have to try new things every once in a while."_

"_Why, when what you already have is perfect." Axel's eyes softened further at the sentiment. _

"_Oh, Roxas." He leaned in kissing the youngster careful to lean them away from the edge of the tower so as not to fall to their deaths. The sound of a throat being cleared broke them apart. _

"_You made a mess," Xion pointed out giggling. Sure enough the banana curry ice cream had melted sending drips onto the hems of both their coats. _

"_Sorry," the redhead apologized dabbing at Roxas' stains with his sleeve. _

"_Don't worry about it. If it's with you, I don't mind a bit of mess."_

_Axel almost purred. "You shouldn't say those sort of things, especially in front of company. I might not be able to control myself."_

"_Maybe I don't want you to."_

"_Do I need to separate the two of you?" Xion laughed cheerily._

"You really don't remember do you? I wonder…"

The blond slunk back as the redhead approached.

"What are you doing?" He was obviously scared of this "stranger," but Axel couldn't afford to accommodate for him. He pushed forward until Roxas was blocked by a wall behind him. Without anywhere to run, the blond's lips were easily taken by Axel, who tried his best to transmit his feelings. This failed, however, as the blond pushed him away roughly.

"What the hell are you doing?" He looked both appalled and disgusted.

Whatever heart Axel had fell to the pit of despair at that moment. He had kept some stray hope that somehow seeing him again might spark his memory, but alas it was hopeless. "Fuck, Roxas. It hurt to see you walk away, but that was nothing compared to this."

"How do you know my name?" Roxas asked suspicion hanging from his words.

A strangled cried erupted from Axel's throat as he threw his hands down in exasperation remembering his mission: eliminate Roxas or be eliminated. It was no contest. As much as he cared for Roxas, he was just too selfish to risk his own life, especially when it was absolutely certain that another member would be sent for his life next.

"I'm sorry, buddy. I didn't want to do this." He shifted into a battle stance summoning his chakrams with ease. Noticing the shift in purpose, Roxas also readied for battle summoning his newly discovered keyblade.

Unwilling to fight him unless he had to, Axel sent out a stream of darkness calling to the lesser Nobodies. Their forms crept up from the floor of the mansion encircling the frightened boy. Their bodies twitched in anticipation, waiting for the opportune moment to pounce. When it came they ambushed as one mass of silvery bodies.

Roxas struck at the Dusks with all his might succeeding in destroying them with practiced strokes. Apparently the body really did remember what the mind forgot. Thinking this, Axel cringed at the realization that the keyblade had been memorable while his touch had not.

He sighed in resolution. It was now or never. He called upon the darkness inside him, massing it into a coil releasing it at once. The power burst into a ring of fire trapping the duo. Roxas started around in shock before hardening his features in determination.

He didn't wait to strike, lunging with full force at him, but Axel caught the blow easily with a chakram.

"You'll have to do better than that."

Roxas growled, striking again faster this time. Again Axel caught it, but it took more effort. He struck back grazing Roxas' upper arm.

"Ah!" he cried out grasping at it without thinking.

"Bad move," Axel said raising a chakram readying to shoot to kill. Realizing his mistake Roxas bolted into action dashing to the side. He charged from the side catching Axel in the back. A crack resounded as his bone adjusted to the pressure. He bent his knees panting a little. He counterattacked twisting his body unnaturally. He hit but fell in the process. As Roxas smashed toward him he rolled to the side tripping Roxas and avoided the contact. Climbing to his feet while the blond remained in shock at suddenly finding himself on the ground, he prepared a death strike.

Raising his hand to the ready he closed his eyes unable to watch. There in the shadows of his head visions played that prevented him from moving.

_Roxas waking up with ruffled hair, clothes misplaced showing bits of skin in places._

_Roxas panting in determination as he fought heartless, a smile of triumph on his face. _

_Roxas' radiate face illuminated by the endless sunset, spoiled only by the adorable blue splotches of blue liquid drying on the edges of mouth. _

"_We're be best friends forever."_

"_I'll always be here for you."_

Axel could feel a tear sliding down his cheek. Ready to lower his weapon in acceptance that he just couldn't do it, he was brought out of his thoughts by the sound of ripping leather. Looking down he stared dumbly at the red staining his black coat. He grunted at the awareness of a deep rooted pain spreading through his abdomen.

"So, that's how it goes, huh?" He laughed as a cough tickled at his throat.

Noticing his shift in attitude, Roxas started at him in horror. "I'm sorry, I didn't…"

"If I have to go, I'd rather it be by your hand. I just wish that we could have had a bit more time, ya know? I wanted to at least be remembered, but I guess that was too much to ask for." Standing suddenly became strenuous and he let himself crumple to the waiting floor. He stared at Roxas' stricken face.

"Hey, don't look like that. You won." He tried smiling reassuringly, but a painful cough prevented him from doing so. "Be happy, okay. At least one of us should."

"I don't-" Roxas shook his head.

Axel chuckled finding it cute regardless of the situation. His vision was growing more blurry, but he focused on Roxas' form for as long as he could. Eventually, there was only darkness and the dulled sound of crying. Finally, that too disappeared so that there was nothing except the welcoming darkness.


	8. Turned Away (Riku)

Title: Turned Away

Song: Everybody Want to Rule the World by Lorde

Riku-Focused

Characters: Riku, Sora, Kairi

Pairing: one-sided Riku/Kairi

Rating: T

**AN: **This is my favorite of the oneshots so far . What sparked this, as well as my in-progress story Born in Darkness, was a doujinshi (I can't seem to refind it) in which there is a hint of darkness in Riku's affection for Sora. My drive for both this and Born in Darkness is to take this hint and expand it. Don't worry, though, Born in Darkness shouldn't change Riku this drastically.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

He wasn't sure when the whispers began. When he thought back on it they had always seemed to be there, lurking in the darkest corners of his mind awaiting their next opportunity to speak. As an only child there wasn't much he lacked which didn't provide much for the voices to comment on. He wasn't envious of any other kids since he could easily acquire whatever he desired.

But when he got a bit older his desires grew away from the material. Living possessions were more difficult to obtain. Luckily, Sora's friendship had been easily enough. While he'd lost a few friends along the way, he'd been able to retain a stable mind due to the steady relationship Sora provided, the relationship that mattered the most to him, at least for a while.

Sora was the playmate. He listened to direction, but also freely shared whatever inputs he had, such as sword fighting tidbits or knowledge about which plants happened to be edible. He was a perfect balance of follower and helper. He was also a good listener. Unlike many of the other kids, Sora was fairly bright, at least bright enough to actually understand him when he ranted about the universe or the nature of existence. Sora even went so far as to give his own ideas, not that it held much viability; still it made enjoyable enough conversation.

For a time this was enough to satisfy him, and the voices living comfortably in the back of his mind. But as soon as the cute little redhead magically washed up on shore that hot summer day the voices had twitched awake.

Their previous whispers hadn't seemed that strange to him considering that they were simple thoughts such as, "you want this toy," or "that kid deserves the pain he's in", but now Riku could tell that they weren't exactly natural for a kid of his age. He began to look at the girl in a way he'd never looked at anyone before. When he looked at her face he didn't see what was there but instead a fabricated image of what it would look like twisted in pleasure, of saliva trailing from her mouth and tears clinging to her eyes. Each day he would scan her clothing searching for every tiny curve emphasized, every inch of skin exposed. Being of a young still fairly innocent age the girl never even noticed his constant scrutiny, and often unknowingly exposed more of herself to him than was best.

The voices pushed on, not content at just looking. They whispered constantly, no longer giving a care about anything beyond her and her radiate smile. Sora became an obstacle that was kept around only because the girl desired it. He played along diligently, planning ways to steal her for himself along the way.

Life carried on this way without much conflict until the day before they were supposed to leave on the raft. The plan had been a brilliant scheme concocted by the voices. He would play nice until they were well out to sea, then an unsuspecting Sora would find himself at the bottom of the sea. Kairi would be upset at first, but alone with him, what other option would she have besides forgiving him?

Thus he was hard at work preparing for the trip when he stumbled upon the other two deep in conversation.

"Let's just leave, the two of us," Kairi suggested.

There was a pause, then Sora replied. "I don't know…"

"Sora, I like you! Can you imagine what it would be like just the two of us? Alone?"

"I like you too, but it still doesn't seem right."

"Fine, then we can tell Riku. Alright?"

"Okay."

Riku contemplated confronting them, but the voices were perked up by something stronger. Deciding that he could deal with them later, he followed the voice's instructions to enter his secret cave. The air was musty and restricted his breathing somewhat. He glanced at the inoperable outline of a door carved into the stone. Even without the voices telling him promises of the other worlds that lay beyond it he would have been intrigued. It had an air about it that hissed of its foreignness.

He used to often trace the outline, searching for any crag in the stone, but each time he only found smooth rock. Nostalgia led him to reach out to the door, and surprisingly, there was an unnatural heat emanating from its core dissipating along the edges. The voices screeched in excitement. _Open the door._

Replicating his actions of old, he traced the outline, however, this time he found a crag easily enough. Digging his fingers in, pebbles crumbled to the ground with pitter-pattering noises, he pulled toward himself and watched as a deep recess of glowing dark purple was exposed. Energy swirled pulling him in, and he didn't try to stop it.

He felt a wave of tense power surge through him at the first touch of the void. He wanted so badly to enter into its welcoming arms, but first he needed to find Kairi. He didn't know where this door would lead him, and he wouldn't be giving up his possession that easily.

Stepping back into the cave he heard the first strikes of thunder mixed with a heavy wind. A tropical storm. Not unusual for these parts, but the timing was uncanny. Riku could still feel echoes of power surging through him, and he wondered if somehow he was the cause. The thought put a devilish smirk on his face.

Exiting the cave he was met with billowing shadowy darkness. Bits would swell until they separated from the rest forming little creatures with shining golden eyes. Riku stared in wonder at them, but they didn't approach him. Instead, they scoured the ground sniffing like a dog in search of scraps.

_Free. Yes. Hearts. Yes._

Ignoring their odd comments, he walked to the end of the dock, taking in the rolling sea waves.

"Riku?" The voice wavered.

"Kairi!" Riku turned expectantly.

"Where's Sora?" she asked glancing around them in fear.

"I don't know," he said.

"We need to find him. I hope he's okay. What is going on here? What are these things?"

"Who cares? I found a way out of here." His face must have shown his mad ambition, because she backed up. "Come with me, Kairi."

"Not without Sora." She shook her head glancing around again.

"He can take care of himself."

The billowing darkness began to wrap around his form, slithering upward like a snake. He continued to hold out his hand, but she made no move to take it. Groaning, he leapt toward her wrapping her up in an unbreakable hold. She struggled against him, but the darkness had already formed a shell around them.

"No!" she cried before going limp.

Thunder cracked loudly as the darkness swelled around them. A whoosh sounded as they took off to who knows where. Faintly, Riku thought he heard Sora calling out to them.


	9. Fading Away (Aqua)

Title: Fading Away

Song: No Light, No Light by Florence + the Machine

Aqua-Focused

Characters: Aqua, Terranort

Pairing: hinted Terra/Aqua

Rating: K+

**AN: **I'm not too fond of this one. I had to really force myself to even write it. My original plan was to make this legit Terra/Aqua, but given my usual "I love you" overkill, I thought that I'd keep it more subtle for once. Yes, I am pretty bad at writing fight scenes. I like to watch them, but writing one is a different matter.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kingdom Hearts. I think after reading my fight scenes you can tell that I don't.

Seeing Terra Aqua runs up to him holding unto her hope. "Terra!" she yells. Maybe hearing her voice can break him out of the dead daze he is currently in.

Slowly he lowers his head focusing on her as if it really was her voice that woke him up. He reaches out sluggishly as if to caress her shoulder gently, but Aqua easily backs up out of his reach with a gasp. However, he breaks his stride, jutting his hand forward and latches onto her neck. Soundlessly and without any change in expression, he lifts her. She dangles her feet huffing in her struggle to continue breathing evenly.

He remains unmoving, blank faced. Then he asks, "Who…am I?" with a face similar to a kid being told for the first time that he is adopted, while a black energy begins to radiate from him.

Aqua sees her opening. That face could never belong to Master Xehanort. "Such a terrible darkness. Fight it. Terra, please!" Her face clenches as her breathing grow more difficult due to her own struggle.

"Terra, you say?" His voice has deepened as if his entire person has changed.

Without warning he drops her, and she lands roughly on her knees. She stays there gasping. He clutches his head, eyes clamped shut in pain. Then he recomposes himself.

"Terra's heart has been extinguished—"he says with a smirk. "Smothered by the darkness within him."

Still on the ground trying to recover, Aqua barely has time to see that he is raising his keyblade ready to strike. She backflips just in time to miss his swing landing eight feet away. The leap somehow cleared her airway, and air enters through her nose and mouth in great gulps. Feeling normal again, she sets her eyes on the man who used to be Terra full of determination.

"My name is Master Aqua. Now return my friend's heart or pay the price."

She doesn't want to fight Terra, but she reminds herself again and again that this isn't Terra. But it is his body, and whatever damage is done is done to him. She doesn't have time to worry about this, though, as he comes full swing at her.

They knock keyblades, the vibration running up both of their arms with a noticeable quiver. He's strong. Has Terra gotten stronger during their time apart, or is this Xehanort's power?

They had had so many misunderstandings as of late, and she wants so badly to set things right between them. She wants to hug him to her, let him know that everything is okay and tell him all the things that she never got around to, but she knows in her veins that if she doesn't fight now she will never get the chance to. So, lifting her head high she smacks at him with her full strength. Now is not the time to show Light's weakness but its strength.

"Terra, I will make you hear me." He blocked the hit with his own keyblade, but the vibration is stronger this time. He sidesteps gaining extra footing which he uses to push at her. She back up forcefully.

Glancing around she spots a loose stone, and she kicks it upward striking him square in the jaw. While he is busy cringing she knocks at the base of his keyblade managing to slacken his grip on it. Just a little more. But as she readies to hit it again he grabs for her arm. His grip is tight and she cries out. She spins her angry face at him. "You will never win."

He laughs, but she kicks down at his feet, and he momentarily relaxes his hold and she uses the opportunity to grab at his keyblade. The weapon slides out of his hold, and when it hits the ground with a thud she casts an aero spell to distance it from them.

He watches as it is swept far out of reach with a scowl. "You haven't won yet." He raises his hands and casts quake making her wobble on her feet. She times a jump when a bit ground is solid jumping to an uninfected area.

She casts raging storm. She approaches him, and while he kicks sharply at her, getting some hits in, he is dealt massive fire damage.

Groaning he backs up clutching at his right shoulder, which has been severely burned. A golden light begins to surround him, and Aqua can feel a lingering lightness filling her. It's Terra!

"Stop fighting back."

"Terra, I know you're in there," she calls, hoping that reassurance can help him win his own internal battle.

His movements become labored as if Terra is restricting them. "This'll teach you. Get out of my hearts!" Before she knows what's happening he's reaching inside his own chest.

"Terra!"

He pulls out and his Guardian appears behind him. It's massive form floats there tauntingly, but it's fading power is evident. A dark portal forms beneath them, and Aqua is forced to watch as their forms sink into the hole.

"No!" Without a thought she leaps at them. Just as it seemed that she wouldn't make it she grasps his hand. The darkness encloses her pulling her along. The pull is strong and her grasp of his hand is broken.

"The darkness can't have you." Summoning her glider she takes off toward his falling, unconscious body. She manages to pull him up on the glider, but their joined weight is too much, and the glider crawls through the black. The opening of light above them is closing rapidly.

"I have to do something or we'll both be lost."

She sighs sadly dissolving the glider. Gently, she places her keyblade into his hand, curling his fingers around the hilt. "I'm with you." And her meaning holds more than one. Surging all of the Light power that she can here in this realm of darkness she shoots him up toward the opening.

"Go!" she yells her arms lifted in farewell.

Seeing him make it through safely, she smiles. "Ven, I'm sorry…I might not make it back as soon as I thought. But I promise that one day I'll be there to wake you up."

Watching the last bead of light disappear, she drifts effortlessly downward. There is no sound, no light, nothing; nothing but thoughts. _Oh, Terra I wish we could have had more time. Why did we have to be pulled away like that? I always believed in you, I swear. Now I'll probably never be able to tell you._


	10. Stray Heart (Terra)

Title: Stray Heart

Song: Dog Days by Within Temptation

Terra-Focused

Characters: Terra, Master Xehanort

Pairing: hinted Terra/Aqua

Rating: K+

**AN: **I had planned out the order of these oneshots so that I wouldn't have two of the same characters in a row, but the more I thought about it seemed like a good idea to write this one as a companion fic to the last, so of course it made sense to post this one right after.

Pretty much this is the same scene as the last oneshot except that it is from Terra's perspective.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters in any way.

Terra's eyes widened as he felt Master Xehanort's presence invading him. It felt like physical claws were gripping into his brain tissue, stretching it.

"No," he gasped through gritted teeth, but as the pain grew in intensity he felt his mouth loosen and turn up in a version of a smile that had never once touched his lips. He could feel the wickedness of it but could do nothing to stop it.

"Hope you like company, Terra, cause we'll be spending a lot of time together from now on." The voice hit him internally, and he registered it as Xehanort's. Instinctually he tried to clench his face and fists, but he had lost all control of his body and nothing happened physically, yet he liked to think that his spirit still expressed his anger.

"Sorry, Aqua," he thought as Xehanort used his body to execute his dastardly plans.

Terra had drifted off, finding it easier to handle his own helplessness when he didn't have to know what he was helpless _about_, but he was brought back to full consciousness when he heard Aqua screaming his name. Oddly, his body no longer seemed to be entirely Xehanort. Instead it almost felt like a lifeless shell that just happened to hold their individual presences.

Slowly his head lowered as if her voice had woke the mindless shell. It reached out sluggishly as if to caress her shoulder gently, but Aqua easily backed up out of its reach with a gasp. However, it breaks its steady stride, jutting the hand forward and latched onto her neck. Soundlessly and without any change in expression, the body lifted her. She dangled her feet huffing in her struggle to continue breathing evenly.

The body stood there unmoving with a blank face. Then a foreign voice, neither Terra's nor Xehanort's, or even their combined, asked, "Who…am I?" The foreign voice sounded like a lost child to his ears, and Terra could see stray wisps of black energy in his peripheral vision.

"Such a terrible darkness. Fight it. Terra, please!" Her face clenches as her breathing grew more difficult due to her own struggle.

"No, stop, Aqua. Just leave while you still can," he silently pleaded. Seeing her like this was extremely painful. The Aqua he knew was strong and self-assured. He could tell that this Aqua was afraid of hurting him, and he knew that this fear, at least right now, was a weakness; a weakness that Xehanort would gladly exploited if given the chance.

"Terra, you say?" The voice deepened, taking on more of Xehanort.

Without warning the body dropped her, and she landed roughly on her knees. She stayed there gasping. The body clutched his head, eyes clamped shut in pain as Terra tries again to fight. If he could take control for even a single moment then Aqua would have time to escape. But Xehanort would have none of it. As he struggled against Xehanort's restraint, Xehanort stretched it tighter, pushing passed what strength Terra had remaining. The body recomposed itself as Xehanort managed to take control.

"Terra's heart has been extinguished—"he says with a smirk. "Smothered by the darkness within him."

Terra screamed within himself at the lies. "Don't believe him. I'm still here."

Aqua was still on the ground recovering, so she barely had time to see the keyblade that Xehanort readied to strike. She backflipped just in time to miss his swing landing eight feet away. Her eyes take on full determination, and Terra sighs in relief. "That's my girl," he thinks.

"My name is Master Aqua. Now return my friend's heart or pay the price."

He feels Xehanort's displeasure at her strong-will, and Xehanort came at her full-swing. They knocked keyblades, the vibration running up both of their arms with a noticeable quiver.

Lifting her head high she smacked at him with her full strength, and Terra can physically feel her weakness turning into strength.

"Terra, I will make you hear me." He wants so badly to answer her but he is still trapped, trapped inside his own body that no longer feel like his own.

Xehanort blocked the hit with his own keyblade, but the vibration was stronger this time. He sidestepped gaining extra footing which he used to push at her. She backed up forcefully.

Glancing around she spotted a loose stone, and she kicked it upward striking him square in the jaw. While he was busy cringing she knocked at the base of his keyblade managing to slacken his grip on it. She readies to hit it again, but he grabbed for her arm. His grip was tight and she cried out. She spun her angry face at him. "You will never win."

He laughed, but she kicked down at his feet, and he momentarily relaxed his hold giving her the opportunity to grab at his keyblade. The weapon slid out of his hold, and when it hit the ground with a thud she cast an aero spell to distance it from them.

He watched as it is swept far out of reach with a scowl. "You haven't won yet." He raised his hands and cast quake making her wobble on her feet. She timed a jump when a bit of the ground was solid jumping to an uninfected area.

She cast raging storm. She approached him, and while he kicked sharply at her, getting some hits in, he was dealt massive fire damage. Terra felt searing pain, but it was muted compared to what Xehanort did. Somehow Terra could feel what he felt as if through a protective membrane. It was weird to say the least.

Groaning Xehanort backed up clutching at his right shoulder, which had been severely burned. Pushing the muted pain aside, Terra tried again to take control. Because of Xehanort's weakened state he was able to gain some uphand, but not enough to actually control the body. Instead he replaced the dark energy with golden light.

"Stop fighting back," Xehanort grunted.

"Terra, I know you're in there," she called happiness evident on her face.

Terra's energy had made Xehanort's movements sluggish. "This'll teach you. Get out of my heart!" Before Terra knows what's happening he's reaching inside his own chest.

"Terra!" Aqua's voice hits his ears but he can't process it, his mind has already been overtaken by a hazy mist. The sense of drifting and a vague taste of darkness touches his skin.

"No!" Aqua again, and with her worried tone is the cool touch of skin to his wrist. The drifting increased in strength and her touch ceased.

"The darkness can't have you." He heard a twinkle before feeling her lift him fully.

"I have to do something or we'll both be lost." She sounds worried, but he isn't sure why.

She sighs, and then something solid is placed into his hand, and she wrapped his fingers around it. "I'm with you."

He sighs peacefully. She always made him feel safe. How did she do it? But before he can even think more on the thought he hears her yell "Go!" and the taste of darkness is replaced with the sweetness of light, and he feels himself drifting in the opposite direction.


	11. Fall from Grace (Riku)

Title: Fall from Grace

Song: Down by Jason Walker

Riku-Focused

Characters: Riku, Sora, Kairi

Pairing: Sora/Kairi, Riku/Sora

Rating: K+

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or any of its characters.

Riku liked being close to Sora. When he was with him his worries often drifted away while they nearly consumed him when he was alone. He was pretty sure that he would have given up completely back in the Realm of Darkness if not for him. It was funny thinking about how much of a loser he was now, since prior to any of their adventures he had thought he was the best thing to exist on the earth. Okay, maybe he hadn't thought that highly of himself, but it was pretty damn close. Now he was ready to give up at any chance.

That was why he so easily gave Sora up.

There had been a small time of reprieve before he and Sora had had to meet Yen Sid for their exam, and during that time life was fairly normal. It was odd being back on Destiny Islands, but companioned with Kairi and Sora he was saved by being drowned by the nostalgia. In that peaceful time he had let his mind dream for the first time since that dark and stormy night that felt so long ago. So many things had changed since then, his feelings for Sora being one of them.

After seeing how strongly Sora had reacted to finding him in the Castle that Never Was he had thought that maybe, just maybe Sora felt the same way, but those thoughts quickly died after seeing him with Kairi.

It wasn't entirely unexpected considering how often he and Sora had discussed their feelings for her, but seeing physical proof was unnerving. There Sora stood with Kairi wrapped in his arms, their lips locked. He was too devastated to move right away, just letting the image burn its way into his mind. When he finally was able to move, he turned and ran away as silently as he could.

Finally far enough way he let himself sink to the sandy ground. It was warm from the still high sun and soft, but it gave him little pleasure. He tried to stop thinking about it. He hadn't really hoped for anything in the first place. So why did it still hurt so much? Was this punishment, or was he just fated to be a failure at everything he did?

Time passed without him realizing, and Sora found him still lying there.

"Riku? Are you okay?"

"Uh…" He tried his best to compose himself still hesitant to show his weakness to anyone. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure? You don't look fine." He reached forward brushing off some sand that had stuck to Riku's cheek. "Or is sprawling out here on the beach your new hobby?"

"I saw you and Kairi. Surprised me is all," Riku said trying to keep his voice even.

"Oh." They lapsed into silence. "Well, uh, I'll see you around I guess." Riku watched him leave with a heavy heart.

Riku was surprised to see that the letter's sender was Sora. He hadn't heard from him in a few years. Uncertainty settled in his belly as he torn the envelop open.

_Hey Riku,_

_I know we haven't talked in quite a while. Not sure why, I mean it's like I'm so busy that I can't write you a letter every once in a while. _

_When you left so suddenly I was unsure whether you did want to talk to me again or not. It was pretty surprising to lose my best friend almost overnight. I thought I would wait it out for you to write to me first, that way I would know that you wanted to talk, but you never._

_Anyway, none of that really matters now, because I did write. I have news. Kairi is pregnant, so we pushed our wedding date up to next week. _

Riku fell hard into the old chair in his small apartment. Married, huh? He shook his head in disbelief.

_I doubt you'll be able to make it on such short notice, but I thought I would invite you anyway. It would have been nice if you could have been my best man, but Tidus has filled in for the role. _

_You know it's weird to think that next week I will be married and soon a father. Actually, Riku, you may not want to hear this, but during our adventures I realized how important you were to me. I never stopped liking Kairi, but you were important to me too. I often wonder what would have happened if I'd confessed to you before she confessed to me. Even after she did I still thought about possibly telling you, just to see what would happen. I almost did too, but by the time I'd build up the nerve, you up and left. _

_Haha, well, if you're not too weirded out, please write back. Soon I really might be too busy to write you letters, but I swear that I'll try my best to respond._

_Love,_

_Sora_

Riku was glad he was sitting, because he would have probably fallen otherwise. He was caught between wanting to treasure the letter and crumpling it up in frustration. This was the last domino in a row he hadn't known he'd set up. It didn't matter anymore if this was punishment or fate, because everything was his own fault. It was his decisions that had led him here. Once you stop fighting you've already lost.

**AN: **I was not sure how to end this. I had multiple possibilities running through my head, one being Kairi dying and them getting together then with Riku learning that his life wasn't a failure, but I decided on this ending since it fit more with the song.


	12. Never Wanted This (Axel)

Title: Never Wanted This

Song: I Never Wanted To by Saosin

Axel-Focused

Characters: Axel, Roxas

Pairing: implied Axel/Roxas

Rating: K+

**AN: **Since I had fun with the Terra/Aqua companion chapters I thought I'd try them again. Roxas' side was the first idea that I had, but since I was searching for more song ideas this one popped out as well.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

"You lied to me! You lied about everything!" Roxas yelled with clenched fists.

Axel dropped his head at this. That was an exaggeration. "No, I didn't," he said simply.

"Really? Then when were you ever telling the truth?"

As often happened when he was around Roxas or Xion a burst of emotion overcame him. "You really are my best friend. I do like spending time with both of you."

"Great, so you only lied about everything that was important."

"You and Xion are important!" Axel was angry. It was one thing for him to be upset with him, but he wouldn't let him belittle himself. "The most important." This was spoken softly, and he wasn't sure if Roxas had heard.

"Doesn't matter, you still hid a lot of important things from me. Why? Did you like making fun of my ignorance behind my back?"

"No. Rox, you gotta believe me. Everything I did was for our best interests."

"Your best interest."

"No! All of ours. If you go through with this, do you know what they'll do to you? I was trying to protect you!" And he had. Yes, maybe he was a selfish person, and yes, maybe the only reason he wanted to protect them so badly was for his own benefit, but he really did.

"Look me in the eyes and promise me that you're telling the truth."

Taking a deep breath, he focused solely on Roxas' hard blue eyes, blue eyes that touched the soul he only had in these moments.

"I'm telling the truth."

Roxas seemed unsure for a minute before he shook his head. "Thank you, Axel, but it doesn't change anything. I need to leave. I need to know what is going on. If you won't tell me then I will figure it out on my own."

"I wish I could." Axel questioned his own decision. Roxas seemed deadest on leaving if he didn't explain to him about Sora, but Axel knew without a doubt that Roxas would leave him if he knew. Axel cared about little anymore. He didn't care about the world, a world that Sora would surely save if he was completed, and he definitely didn't give a damn about the Organization. Keeping Roxas with him might help the Organization and damn the world, but it was the only option that seemed plausible.

"If Xemnas found out you knew then he'd kill you. Not eliminate like the other Nobodies. Roxas, you are special. You. Will. Die." He emphasized the words, and Roxas visibly flinched as he thought about what this meant.

"Sorry, Axel, but this is bigger than just me." And that was the difference between them. With Axel it was all about himself, it always had, but Roxas, he was capable of self-sacrifice. That was why he knew that Roxas would merge with Sora if learned the truth.

Axel scrambled for whatever other excuses he could come up with. "Why is Xion so important to you? She's just an artificial replica. She's not even really living. Her life isn't as important as yours." The words left a bitter taste in his mouth, but they were necessary.

"How dare you." Roxas' voice was acidic. He glared so deadly at him that for a moment Axel thought he might punch him, but then Roxas' face softened. "I know what you're doing. Sorry, Axel, but I'm leaving. Goodbye."

He watched as he began to walk away. "Can't I at least come with you?"

Roxas stopped. Then he turned halfway around cocking his head over his shoulder. "No. If Xemnas is as bloodthirsty as you say he is then you should stay here and try to cover for me somehow."

"Sure, leave me to fend off the monster," Axel muttered under his breath. Did Roxas really care more about Xion than him, or was this just punishment for his lies? He wasn't sure, and he assumed that he'd never know the truth. Hah, the irony of longing for this truth made his stomach laugh with painful fire.

Roxas resumed walking as he grew more and more distant Axel could feel emotion slipping. Tears welled in his eyes before the connection shattered leaving him with a gnawing hole in his chest where his heart would be. The sadness was gone, but the remembrance was not, and the tears fell.


	13. Goodbye (Roxas)

Title: Goodbye

Song: Goodbye by Secondhand Serenade

Roxas-Focused

Characters: Roxas, Axel

Pairing: implied Axel/Roxas

Rating: K+

"You lied to me! You lied about everything!" Roxas yelled with clenched fists. He was so angry, but even more than that he was disappointed. Axel was supposed to be his friend, and weren't friends truthful?

Axel dropped his head at this. "No, I didn't," he said simply.

"Really? Then when were you ever telling the truth?"

His voice took on stronger emotion. "You really are my best friend. I do like spending time with both of you."

Roxas was glad to hear this, but he couldn't let this get in the way of the point. "Great, so you only lied about everything that was important."

"You and Xion are important!" Axel was angry which surprised Roxas. He hadn't exactly meant the phrase that way.

"Doesn't matter, you still hid a lot of important things from me. Why? Did you like making fun of my ignorance behind my back?" Even though Axel said that he was his friend the idea of him having fun at his expense still seemed likely. Nothing else made sense.

"No. Rox, you gotta believe me. Everything I did was for our best interests."

Yeah right. Axel didn't have a heart. Why would he even care to begin with? But then why did Roxas care? "Your best interest."

"No! All of ours. If you go through with this do you know what they'll do to you? I was trying to protect you!"

Axel sounded sincere, and he wanted to believe him, but after all the deception he'd already pulled off he couldn't. "Look me in the eyes and promise me that you're telling the truth."

Taking a deep breath, Axel focused solely on Roxas' hard blue eyes as he asserted "I'm telling the truth," and somehow in that moment Roxas could swear he felt something. Something light and intangible. He wasn't sure what it was, but he knew that it was telling him that it was the truth.

But what did it change? Nothing, and that is what hurt Roxas the most. The past was done, and no matter what Axel said at this point it couldn't be changed.

Shaking his head he said, "Thank you, Axel, but it doesn't change anything. I need to leave. I need to know what is going on. If you won't tell me then I will figure it out on my own."

"I wish I could." Axel paused before continuing. "If Xemnas found out you knew then he'd kill you. Not eliminate like the other Nobodies. Roxas you are special. You. Will. Die."

He emphasized the words, and Roxas visibly flinched as he thought about what this meant. What was death? He'd never really thought about it, and now probably wasn't the best time to. Regardless, it still didn't matter. Wasn't Xion in the same boat? Couldn't she die for her actions? If so then that gave him even more reason to leave so that he could protect her.

"Sorry, Axel, but this is bigger than just me."

"Why is Xion so important to you? She's just an artificial replica. She's not even really living. Her life isn't as important as yours."

Roxas' voice was acidic as he let out, "How dare you." He glared at Axel's horrible betrayal, but then his face softened when he realized that it wasn't a betrayal. If he really did believe that Xemnas would kill him, then wasn't Axel still just trying to protect _him_? "I know what you're doing. Sorry, Axel, but I'm leaving. Goodbye."

Roxas had already begun to walk away when he heard Axel's plea. "Can't I at least come with you?"

Roxas stopped. Then he turned halfway around cocking his head over his shoulder. "No. If Xemnas is as bloodthirsty as you say he is then you should stay here and try to cover for me somehow."

Of course Roxas didn't mean that he wanted Axel to take his punishment. Even with everything he wouldn't wish harm on him, but right now Xion and learning the truth about Sora was what mattered.

He resumed walking, but the more distance there became between them the more difficult continuing became. Would he ever see him again? Probably not, and this was what stirred the sadness he had been trying to keep at bay. Anger was easier since he could blame Axel. Blame was easy. But sadness gave no solace, no ease. As he trudged further and further he felt its weight upon him like an iron clasp restricting his heart.


	14. I'm Here (Ven)

Title: I'm Here

Song: Afraid by Sarah Fimm

Ventus-Focused

Characters: Ventus, Vanitas

Pairing: Vanitas/Ventus

Rating: T

**AN: **I read a Vanven oneshot forever ago that also had them talking on the roof after an alternative BBS ending in which Vanitas stayed with them in the Land of Departures. I would love to give credit to that author for the idea, but sadly I have no idea what the fic was.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own KH or its characters. I also borrowed this idea of Vanitas and Ven talking on the roof from previously mentioned fic.

Ventus finished crawling up to the roof with a huff. That sure was a climb, but as he looked around at the starry sky it was worth the effort. Like this the world seemed so peaceful, and he would have laid back to take the view in fuller if not for the other boy that diverted his attention. He had been his original reason for climbing up here after all.

"Hey, you okay?" he asked. The only response was a grunt. Ven settled down next to the other boy who was making a point of not acknowledging his presence.

They sat in silence until Ven finally spoke up again. "Beautiful isn't it? It's crazy to think that each of their lights is just another world like this one. Really makes you feel small."

Vanitas granted him with eye contact.

"Are you okay?" Ventus asked again.

"No." Ventus frowned. "Would you be?"

"I don't know. I guess not. But Vani, you know I'm here for you."

"Don't call me that!" he spat.

"Sorry." The blond scratched his head unsure of what to say next. "I'm sure you'll feel better soon."  
"Really? You have no idea what I'm going through. Do you know what it's like to only know Darkness? To be left without any allies? To become a prisoner?"

Ven stared intently in defense. "It's not like that. If you just work at it I'm sure you can find the Light. Then we could be your new allies."

"It's impossible. I am a being of Darkness or have you forgotten?"

Ven looked down at his hands. "No." He wrung his fingers together. "Couldn't I share my Light with you?"

Vanitas looked at him skeptically. "And how do you plan on doing that?"

"Um…" Ven blushed looking the other way.

When he didn't answer Vanitas laughed, and it wasn't maniacal like all the others Ven had heard; this one was still harsh, obviously mocking him, but it had a gentler air; this one was heartfelt. "God, Ventus, you and your merry band of imbeciles are just too much."

"Fine then," Ven huffed irritated at being called stupid when he had only been trying to help, "do whatever the hell you want." He rose and started back toward the ladder, but Vanitas grabbed his wrist. The blond turned and was shocked at Vanitas' expression. It was pleading, as if him being left alone was the last thing he wanted. "Fine," Ven huffed sitting down again.

They lapsed into silence, both just looking at the beautiful view. Ven had lain on his back giving him a larger perspective.

"Thanks for staying with me." The words were mumbled, and Ven wondered if he had only imagined them. Regardless, a small smile spread on his face. Without a word he sat up and inched his hand forward so that his fingers could brush against the other boy's. He expected for Vanitas to shake his hand away, but instead he lifted his hand allowing Ven to initiate a true handhold.

Too afraid to talk, Ven internally pleaded for some of his Light to go to Vanitas, or for some of his Darkness to come into him, or for anything else that would help him. He liked to believe that something had happened since Vanitas' muscles relaxed and his face became gentler.

Before Ven knew what had come over him he had leaned his head on the other boy's shoulder. He felt his muscles tense under him before relaxing again.

"You never answered my question."

"What question?"

"How did you plan on sharing your Light?"

"Like this," Ven said smiling. He leaned up kissing the other boy gently. Vanitas remained still, but when he pulled away, Vanitas pulled him back in rougher. They continued kissing over and over, and Vanitas pushed him down so that he hovered over him. When they finally broke apart for a breather, Ventus brushed his check while staring up into his eyes.

"You aren't so bad, you know."

"Don't mock me," Vanitas grunted scrambling off of him.

"I'm not. Just give it time. I'm sure the others will like you too."

"Those losers? Why would I want them to like me?"

"So that you aren't alone anymore."

Vanitas looked back at him with an earnest expression. "But I'm not."

Ven's heart raced. "Yeah." He kissed him again.


	15. Contrast (Vanitas)

Title: Contrast

Song: Milk by Garbage

Vanitas-Focused

Characters: Ventus, Vanitas

Pairing: Vanitas/Ventus

Rating: T

**AN: **Just like I'm Here, this takes place in a canon divergence in which Vanitas is living with Ven and them. As a side note, I am giving up my planned order of these oneshots, because I am not feeling the inspiration for them in anywhere near that order.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its characters.

I have often watched them from the shadows, but being a part of this simple band of friends does not compare to observing. They are goofy and pointless, kind and gentle, all things that I'm not good at. No, I am harsh and serious, cruel and dangerous. Anyone can see that I do not belong. Anyone except Ven. The idiot sticks to me like glue, as if I'm not a bastard who could strike to kill at any moment. Guess he's right, though. My evil instincts seem to have dulled somewhat. I'm not sure if it's the environment or if I simply don't _need _them anymore. It doesn't really matter.

However less evil I may now be, I'm anything but docile. I'm a string that is pulled so tightly that I can't even control when I snap. I know that Ven just wants to help, that he may genuinely want to be my friend, but I just can't bring myself to accept it. Losing was already a heavy blow, how can I show that level of weakness in addition?

Or maybe I'm just scared to get that close. Ven is everything that I lack, everything that I secretly want. He's light where I'm dark, understanding and soothing. I can't help thinking that he could complete me, make my endless emptiness disappear, but I can't bring myself to admit this emptiness, not even fully to myself. I am fine, and that is what matters.

Arms wrapping around me startle me. What the hell? Immediately I know it is Ven. Even without the ability to sense his pure counterpart-light, I'd know. None of the others would ever come this damn close to me. You would think I am the pet tarantula by how they treat me. And Ven is the strange kid who opens the cage and holds the thing, knowing full well that it is ugly and terrifying, yet incredibly fragile…

"What the hell, Ven?" I growl grabbing his arms and unhooking them. He exerts more pressure forcing them back into place. Sighing, I let them stay. He nuzzles my back with his nose.

"Morning." That's not an answer. I scowl.

"And you are hugging me why?"

"Cause I wanted to."

Now I really scowl. "And why is that?"

"I came to wake you up, but you looked huggable, so I decided to hug you instead."

"That is ridiculous. I am not huggable."

"Yes you are." He tightens his arms in emphasis. I have to admit that I like the feel of him against me. A part of me longs to just sink into his embrace, but I decide remaining still will have to suffice if I want to maintain my façade.

We stay that way unmoving, and I think he may have dozed off until he whispers something inaudible against my shoulder blade, his lips utterly caressing the skin there. This boy has no idea the bull he was goading.

I turn facing him, our faces only six inches apart. I stare at him straight-on, an evident hunger apparent on my face. I expect him to flinch or be repulsed in some way, but instead he meets my gaze with a pleasant one, as if he's been waiting for this admission from me.

"Care repeating yourself?"

"I said that I wanted you to hug me back," he says as if he's telling me the weather. I decide to react just as simply. I've held myself in check long enough to leave marks.

I pull him to me hard, not leaving even an ounce of breathing room. The idea that I would physically pull him into me if it were possibly flits across my mind. Maybe then I would be whole. I imagine his reaction to such thoughts. I would devour him in more ways than one.

The oddity of the situation must be doing something to me, because I repeat the thought just to see how he _does_ react.

"I'd let you." No fear, no shock, just a relinquish. This boy. His selflessness is unfathomable. If he isn't careful I may take advantage.

"You would? So, you don't mind if I do this?" I smack my lips into his own, and he readily opens his mouth. I search his mouth and back with hands that have traveled under his loose grey t-shirt. My body aches to feel him, and by the way he is responding it seems that his does as well.

I pull back, giving him the opportunity to escape that I no longer expect him to take.

He gives me a stunning smile that holds such satisfaction that it makes my dark heart feel so much lighter. "Finally," he says play hitting my shoulder.

"What?" Much to my displeasure my eyes bulge.

"Don't tell me that you never realized that I've practically been throwing myself at you." He's been throwing himself at me? The sadistic bastard who tried to steal his identity and kill his friends? I decide this boy must be an idiot.

He points at my expression. "You really didn't? Wow, Vanitas, you sure are slow." He breaks out in a laugh.

An annoying idiot.

I scowl. "Are you stupid? Do you know what I could do to you? I could strangle you right here." I place my hands over his neck applying just enough pressure to prove my point.

"But you won't. I'm sure that whatever you do to me right now, I won't object to it."

"Big words." I force him onto his back as I climb atop him, my hands still in place. I squeeze a bit harder sure now that he feels some discomfort, yet he doesn't so much as wiggle. He brings his own hands up to my hair curving into the strands there. Feeling fractured, I let my hands drop. Somehow he's able to see me even behind every shield I put in place. He knew that I wanted him, knew that I wouldn't harm him, knew that what I was showing was only a shield.

"You really are an idiot," I mutter against his neck with an even amount of affection. He laughs pressing my head deeper into the crook of his neck. I suck at the flesh delighting in his mounting gasps. When I raise my head I am gifted with the sight of a bright pink swell. A proud smile sits on my face.

He touches the mark with a playful glare. Then he kisses me again. He turns us so that I fall back onto the bed again. We are again facing each other, arms intertwined in a strange bundle.

"I like you better this way."

"What way," I glare trying to forge some of my previous shield.

"Honest." I am taken aback. He is able to see me so easily, yet I feel like I know nothing about him. He's not an idiot, he's perceptive and keen.

"Just shut up." I don't care if my embarrassment is evident or not. I'm sure he will detect it regardless. I pull him back into a crushing hug. The sun is up, and we are supposed to be going down for breakfast, but I don't give a damn. We lie there for what feels like an eternity, and if it is with _him _I'd gladly spend longer.


	16. Dead and Gone (Axel)

Title: Dead and Gone

Song: Youth by Daughter

Axel-Focused

Characters: Axel/Lea, Kairi, Roxas, Sora, Saix, Donald, Goofy, Riku, Olette, Pence, Heyner

Pairing: Axel/Roxas, Riku/Sora, Kairi/Sora

Rating: General

"Maybe waiting isn't good enough," Kairi mumbled to herself.

"My thoughts exactly," rang an invisible voice. Kairi started around confused. "If you have a dream don't wait, act," the redhead appeared out of a portal of darkness, "one of life's little rules. Got it memorized?"

"Who are you?" she asked on the defense. Only dangerous people come from the darkness.

"Axel," he answered nonchalantly. "I happen to be an acquaintance of Sora's. Why don't we go see him?" He reached his hand out beckoning.

"Sora?" She wavered, about to take the bait, when a yellow dog ran up barking. Kairi whirled as a whistle noise filled the air. Silvery creatures surrounded her and another portal of darkness had formed behind her.

"We've got something in common, Kairi. You and I both miss someone we care about." He pounded lightly against his chest, where his heart would be, but the girl didn't watch. She was mesmerized by the portal instead. "Hey, I feel like we're friends already."

Without warning, Kairi took off toward the portal. "You're not acting very friendly. I won't let you hurt Sora," she called as she disappeared.

"Well, that could have gone better," Axel mumbled ruffling his spiky hair as he scratched at his head.

Since Kairi knew nothing of the worlds, it was a gamble as to where she had ended up, yet Axel was positive that she was in Twilight Town. There was just something about the place that called to people, that spoke of safety; and safety is what Kairi would be looking for.

He materialized in The Usual Place feeling a rush of relief when he spotted the girl there. "I just knew you'd be here." He spoke calmer than he felt. "I tell ya, Kairi, you've got a lot of guts jumping right into the darkness like that. A normal person would have turned into a heartless in 10 minutes."

He stepped forward, and was vaguely aware of the two boys (Roxas' pretend friends) lunging forward. Neither succeeded, stumbling behind him somewhere. The girl just stood immobile, allowing for him to snatch Kairi's wrist without hindrance.

The princess struggled, of course, but the attempts were weak. "Let go of me! Let go!"

Ignoring her protests he led them into the darkness.

"What do you want with me?" she asked, more calm now that they'd traveled further into the waiting darkness.

"I want Sora, and you are the perfect bait."

"What do you want with him?" Her eyes sent daggers his way.

"Sora can give me back someone important."

"I don't understand."

"Roxas. You know him right?"

Her eyes widened slightly. "Him? Yes, but who is he?"

Axel laughed. "You really don't know what's going on do you?"

She stamped her foot hard. "It's not my fault that no one tells me anything."

"When you're little lover boy turned into a heartless, Roxas was created. In order to bring him back I need to do that again."

She stopped walking, skidding her shoes into the floor. "You can't! I won't let you take him from me!" Instead of the anger that he expected, what he saw on her face was despair.

"Sorry, princess. Nothing personal, just what I gotta do."

"But why? Why Sora? He's always been such a good person."

"It has to be him. Hey, I didn't make the rules."

"You really care for Roxas don't you?" She had recomposed herself and was now looking at him quizzically.

Axel glared at the tightness the question stirred in his chest. "I'm a Nobody. Unlike you I don't have a heart."

Kairi wasn't buying it. "Then why are you so desperate to get him back?"

He raised his hands in defeat. "Fine. Okay, I like him, but only because he let me actually feel. All I have now is the memory."

Her sympathy showed on her face. "I'm sorry, Axel."

Axel couldn't believe that her attitude toward him had shifted so quickly. Were all somebodies this understanding, or was this a trait of being a princess of heart? "Then help me."

He watched as she contemplated her options. "What is your plan exactly?" she asked tentatively.

"Not much more than forcing Roxas back out. But your boy turned back from a heartless once, right? Can't he just do it again?"

Recognition sparked on her face. "That's right! If I'm there I should be able to bring him back. Then we can all be happy, right?" She smiled ecstatically. Axel found it odd considering that the problems had yet to be solved, but it was contagious, and soon a smile had set upon his lips as well.

"Well then come on!" she demanded trudging on through the corridor.

They finally exited the darkness entering into a white castle with many wide corridors. Axel led her in various directions until their way was blocked by a blue-haired man. He didn't look nearly as friendly as Axel.

"Saix," Axel bit out.

"Axel," Saix acknowledged emotionlessly. "What are you doing with a princess of heart?"

"None of your business." He tried to push passed him, but Saix shifted to continue blocking the path.

"Number VIII, I asked you a question. As your superior, I demand an answer."

"Kairi here is going to bring Sora to us." The men met glares.

"Good work, number VIII. I will be taking her from here."

"What?" Axel exclaimed anger in his voice.

"I will not repeat myself."

Axel summoned his chakrams. In response Saix called the beserkers under his command. The large Nobodies enclosed the three of them in a gapless circle.

Kairi shifted uncomfortably. She clasped onto Axel's black cloak unconsciously.

Saix closed in so that he was standing right in front of the intimidated girl. He reached for her wrist, but Axel lashed out with his chakram.

"Think carefully before acting here. Is this worth extermination?" Axel flinched and let his chakrams fade away.

Kairi looked back and forth between the two frantically.

"Sorry, Kairi, but he's right. There's no point if I cease to exist." He laughed tastelessly.

Saix's non-too gentle grasp on her wrist was tightened further as she struggled forcefully.

"No! Let me go!" If what she had directed at the redhead were protests, what she unleashed now were revolts.

Saix snapped his fingers and the beserkers closed in on her-ignoring Axel who was averting his gaze.

Axel regretted losing Kairi, and oddly it wasn't entirely because of his own self desires. Her expression as she was dragged away had been pitiful, and frankly, as much as he blamed Sora, he didn't want her to have to go through the loss that he had. Trying to get to him first seemed like the best course of action.

Axel stood waiting in Radiant Garden. It was obvious from the ruckus that Xemnas was stirring up that Sora would be around somewhere. All he had to do was wait for him. Waiting left him time to weight his three options. He could take Sora on, but he would no doubt have backup. He could tell him about Kairi and wait for him to get her back safely, except this relied on the fact that Kairi would still go through with their deal. Or he could team up with him to save Kairi and hope that she would then team up with him in thanks of his rescue. The third seemed the best bet at getting Roxas back, yet it also seemed the most dangerous considering that it meant going against Xemnas to his face.

Finally Sora and his two-animal posse showed. Axel uncrossed his arms and stepped forward.

"Come on, it's a setup by Organization XIII. Xemnas is using you to destroy the heartless. It's his big master plan."

"Xemnas?" the duck asked.

"The guy you just saw. He's their leader." He bulged his eyes out in emphasis to how influential a guy he was. "Got it memorized?" he said his signature phrase while pointing to his head. "X-E-M-N-A-S."

Sora's mouth relaxed showing that Axel was getting somewhere. Yes, feed him information and gain his trust.

But of course the dog had to push further. "Organization XIII wants to get rid of the heartless?" he asked.

"Man you're slow." The Nobody waved a hand. "Every heartless slain with that keyblade releases a captive heart." He did a mock motion of grabbing a heart. "That is what the Organization is after."

"So, what are you guys going to do with the hearts?" the duck asked.

"I'm not telling." At least not yet. He needed to keep some leverage.

The duck was not happy. "Tell us!" he demanded stomping his foot.

"You, you're the one that kidnaped Kairi."

Axel was proud. "Bingo. The name's Axel." He pointed to himself before repeating his signature phrase.

"Where is Kairi? Please just tell me." His voice was laden with desperation.

Axel's face dropped, and he scratched his forehead nervously. Leaning back he said sincerely, "Look about Kairi," he leaned forward, "I'm sorry."

"Axel," came Saix's voice before the signs of his portal became visible.

"Uh-oh." Axel summoned his own portal. Self-preservation always came first.

Sora rushed toward him, but Saix's outstretched arm stopped him.

"We'll make sure he receives the maximum punishment," was the last thing the Nobody heard before the portal closed around him.

"It's no use." Sora's voice reached Axel's ears even before he physically landed in Betwixt and Between.

"Don't stop moving. The darkness will overtake you," he cautioned, killing two dusks immediately afterward. His face was dead serious. "Get going!"

"Why?" Sora asked.

"Don't ask just do it." Distracted by Sora's disregard for the urgency of the situation he was ambushed by a dusk. He fell, and Sora rushed over to help, but Axel managed to kill the nearest two before he got there.

"You okay?"

Axel crawled up. Ignoring the question, he spoke the confession that had been plaguing his mind. "I kidnaped Kairi, but she got away from me. After that Saix caught her. He's a member of Organization XIII. Saix, got it memorized?" It was a sorry attempt at lightening the mood and lacked his usual self-importance. "Now go save her."

More dusks appeared behind Sora. They floated down to his level, but his instincts alerted him. Turning he slashed them.

"Leave us alone," Sora demanded.

Staring at the mass of incoming dusks, Axel realized that this was probably the end for him. Even if he managed to escape this, there was the Organization to worry about. Why had he cared so much about Roxas? Now it seemed silly. Hadn't self-preservation always been his main priority? Yet now he had damned himself for the sake of seeing a blond brat again and was feeling guilty over getting Kairi involved where she shouldn't have had to.

He fought, ignoring any bruises, it didn't matter now anyway. He and Sora killed and killed and killed, but they just kept coming.

"Think I liked it better when they were on my side."

"Feeling a little regret?" Sora filled in for the lightness he had been trying to provide.

"Eeh, I can handle those punks." There, the lightness had finally come back. "Watch this."

He leapt toward the core of the mass. Reaching deep within himself he unleashed his inner flames. They burst in a massive wave burning every single dusk.

"Wow!" Axel would have laughed at his excitement if it hadn't hurt so much.

Sora approached noticing his sorry state now laying on the ground, a few flames still simmering.

"You're fading away." He actually sounded sad.

Strange. Had there just been a flicker of blond, or was he seeing things.

"Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack, ya know what I mean? Though Nobodies don't actually have beings, right?" Dry humor always makes things easier to deal with, right? "Anyway, I digress. Go. Find Kairi. Oh, almost forgot. Sorry for what I did to her."

"When we find her you can tell her that yourself."

Forever the optimist. It only made the reality that much more painful. What would Roxas have done in this situation, he wondered. The ever-present tightness in his chest increased.

"Think I'll pass. My heart just wouldn't be in it, ya know? Haven't got one." He laughed, but his insides felt like they were crying.

"Axel. What were you trying to do?" There it was again, a faint gold.

"I wanted to see Roxas. He... was the only one I liked... he made me feel... like I had a heart." Fighting hadn't left him time to focus on his feelings, but they were definitely there; sadness over losing Roxas, regret for abandoning Kairi, hate for Sora, and something indescribable that he felt for the boy. "It's kind of... funny. You make me feel... the same..."

Roxas must be in there somewhere, he realized. He had been stupid. Sora had done nothing. Without him Roxas would never have existed to begin with. Suddenly all he wanted was to thank him for that, to brush his cheek and hope that Roxas felt it in turn, but there was no time.

"Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now go..." Mustering the little energy he still had he opened a green swirling portal that would lead Sora to The World that Never Was.

"Axel." It wasn't Sora's voice he heard, but Roxas', sweet Roxas. A pleasant smile formed on his lips.

"Hi, I missed you."

"I didn't want to leave you, you know that right? I had wanted to stay with you forever."

"Yeah…Funny I can't remember why you left. Doesn't matter, though. You're here now."

"Axel." His voice was sad.

"Cheer up, Rox. We can be together now."

"You idiot." Tiny tears could be seen on his cheeks, and vaguely Axel noticed that he looked a bit translucent.

"I love you, you know."

The boy heaved. "You tell me that now? Ha, why does everything have to be so screwed up?" It sounded rhetorical, but Axel answered anyway.

"Not everything. We did have some good time, right?"

"Yeah."

Axel's body was fading faster now, bits of black drifting like pieces of ash from a fire.

Axel's smile faded. "I don't think I have much time left."

"Any final requests?"

"Yeah, be happy. One of us should."

"That's not fair! Don't go! I don't want to be alone!"

Only Axel's face was left now. "You won't, never. You have Sora." Then he faded to darkness.

Lea started at Sora and Riku laughing across the room with a fond expression. When the light hit just so he swore that he could make out Roxas. The boy looked equally happy, though in a different sort of way. It was obvious to Lea that Sora had a thing for his silver haired friend. He often wondered what it was like for Roxas, being trapped inside a distinct personality. Lea and Axel weren't all that different, so he had merely been remolded.

Before being Axel he'd had his own crushes, past relationships, but now it seemed like Axel's affection for the blond had been branded on his heart. Not that he would do anything; Roxas was better off with Sora. He was positive of this now as he looked upon the combined grinning face. He just wished that he could talk to him every once in a while, make sure he didn't feel forgotten or something similar.

It was also weird to think about the fact that Roxas, via Sora, would probably end up being with someone else. How would Roxas feel about that? How would Lea take it? He shook the thought from his head. It didn't matter. Sora had the right to his life.

Kairi had come by a while ago, but he hadn't talked with her yet. Leaving the boys to their jokes and antics, he went in search of the girl. He found her sitting on the steps to the tower.

"Hey!" he called raising a hand.

She smiled gently, but didn't say anything.

He sat down next to her, and they both looked at the scenery in silence for a while.

"I wanted to apologize for what Axel did to you before."

"It's fine. I understand wanting to seeing your loved one again. In the end you helped me. I don't think I would have seen the boys quite yet if you hadn't brought me there."

Lea was taken aback by the praise. "Well, I'm glad it worked out then."

"You don't still want to go through with the plan?" she asked prodding.

"No. That was Axel's plan. Lea is capable of selflessness."

"Really?" She raised an eyebrow.

Lea waved his hands. "Harsh! Okay, maybe I'm still selfish, but he's better off this way. I see that now."

"Yeah I think so too. I think Sora's good for him."

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for a long time. "I think Riku's good for Sora too."

"Hmm?"

"Come on, you realize they like each other don't you?"

He frowned at her. "And that doesn't bother you?"

"Of course it does! It's just, well they're my best friends. If I have to give them up to someone, it might as well be each other." She giggled. "Besides, they can't get rid of me that easily. I'm ready to tag along this time." She flicked her newly appointed keyblade with pride.

"Hah, Roxas won't be getting rid of me either." He grinned at her donning his own keyblade. Holding their respective keyblades out so that the tips touched, they made a silent vow. Their plan may have changed, but their partnership was still on.


	17. If I Had a Heart (Vanitas)

Title: If I Had a Heart

Pairing: Vanitas/Ventus

Characters: Vanitas, Ventus, Terra, Aqua

Rating: M

Song: If I Had a Heart by Fever Ray

**AN: **I'm happy with where this went. When I first had the idea it was to have Vanitas treating Ventus pretty badly, but having him accept it since he knew that it was all that Vanitas was capable of. It, however, took a fluffy turn. Yay for fluff :3

This, like the other vanven oneshots, takes place in a au ending to BBS where Vanitas goes to live with them in Land of Departures.

"Vani, are you awake?" Ventus called as he entered the small, dark room. A grunt was his only reply as he worked the currents open spilling light across the figure laying stiffly on the bed.

Ventus frowned and approached the bed. Reaching out a hand he proceeded to poke the figure until an eye cracked open meeting his gaze steadily.

"How many times have I told you not to call me that?" Vanitas voice sounded deadly, but Ven just smiled and plopped himself down beside him.

"Did Vanitas wake up on the wrong side of the bed? Look at how nice a day it is."

Vanitas grunted turning so that the light wouldn't hit his face. Ven frowned tugging on his shoulder in an attempt to turn him back over.

"You know what, I think that's your problem. You need sunlight and fresh air."

"Sure, that will fix all my problems."

There was a pause. "Well, no…but it won't hurt."

"Neither does sleep." He attempted to go back to sleep, but Ventus continued talking.

"Come eat breakfast. It's getting cold, and you know how Terra is about cold breakfasts."

"Those losers actually cared to wait for me?"

"Of course not." Ventus chuckled. "I refused to let them eat."

"Ooh, big Ventus is calling the shots now?"

Ven smiled at the uncommon humor. "Yeah, I try. Now come on!"

He pushed him up into a sitting position and was trying to pull him up from the bed when Vanitas tugged him into a kiss. It was forceful and passionate as usual, and it left Ventus breathless. When they broke apart he just started transfixed.

"I think I'd rather watch you eat breakfast."

"But Terra-"

"They can take care of themselves. They've probably already eaten as it is." Ventus looked uncertain, but he nodded nonetheless.

Vanitas made no movement signaling Ventus that he was supposed to undress him. He did so slowly, pulling his sleeping shorts down tentatively and feeling along the already-present bulge in his briefs.

"What'd you dream about?" he asked while brushing his cheek along the bulge.

"None of your damn business," Vantias spat while biting his lip.

Ventus removed his briefs and stared in awe at the glorious pink organ. Somewhere in the back of his head he knew that it was weird to find it so attractive since it was practically his own dick, but he never let the worry truly surface. Instead he just focused on its lovely coloring, thin light blue veins running along the sides, and tip that looked so edible.

"I dream about you too, you know?" He took the head into his mouth slurping noisily as he twirled his tongue around it.

Vanitas released a guttural sound at the contact. "What makes you think that I dreamed about you?"

"Who else would do these sorts of things with you?" His voice was haughty and he intentionally spoke them close to the tip so that his breath hit it so.

Vanitas choose not to answer, so Ventus went back to his meal. He descended taking in as much as he could in one go. Lifting back up he sucked contorting his cheeks. Lowering he set upon gently messaging the balls. The brunet's breath hitched at the new contact and a hand gripped his head. Ventus continued the pattern faster now with the added encouragement.

A loud gurgle alerted Ventus of the coming release and readied his mouth halfway down the shaft. Some of the substance crept from the confines of his mouth, but he managed not to gag.

Licking at the stray droplets, he asked, "Satisfied?"

"Never," came the immediate response.

Ventus frowned. "You want to do me too? I don't know about you, but I really am hungry."

"I will always want more."

Ventus could tell that he meant more than just sex. "Why are you never happy?"

"Hm, I wonder," was the spiteful reply.

"Seriously, Vanitas, I'm trying here. What do you expect from me?"

There was a long pause as Vanitas looked away. "Nothing."

"Huh?" Ven blinked.

"Nothing. I don't expect anything from you."

"Then why are you always so moody?"

"Because I don't have a heart. I can't feel happy, I can't love."

A blush set upon the blond's face. "Wh-y are you talking about love all of a sudden?"

Vanitas looked him straight in the eyes. "It's obvious. There's no other reason someone like you would do these sorts of things," he gestured to his bare crotch, "otherwise."

The blond fake smirked. "Hah, for all you know I'm just a slut."

Vanitas laughed. He really laughed.

"You seem to forget that we used to be one. I know you inside and out, Ventus." The way he said it made the blond feel like he was being devoured. He shivered.

"Well, uh, what do we do then?"

"About what?'

"You, of course. How can you become happy?"

"I can't."

The blond smacked him hard on the head. "Stop being so freaking cynical! You know what, I will make you happy. Just you watch." He smirked triumphantly.

"Really now? And how will you begin?" the brunet asked, his voice laden with lust.

"By eating breakfast for starters."

Much to Vanitas' annoyance and Terra and Aqua's astonishment, Ventus insisted on sharing a room with Vanitas from then on. Apparently he thought his positivity would wear off on him, but if Vanitas had to spend one more minute in that exhausting light he would kill someone.

Ventus had a habit of giving him sweet morning kisses. The brunet wouldn't object if they led to something heavier, but they didn't. They were nothing more than displays of affection; affection so sugary that his teeth seemed to tingle afterward. He always instigated hot touches, and sometimes the boy gave in, but more often than not he pulled away with a swat on the wrist.

"Be a good boy," he would reprimand. Too much sex was clouding his mind, or so Ven claimed. Vanitas thought he was insane.

Another habit he had was making small talk late into the night. This was irritating for two reasons: Vanitas loved sleep, and Ventus talked about the boring crap. At first he'd tried not responding, but this just spurred the boy on about cloud shapes, rabbits he'd seen in the yard, and the stupid stunts he'd seen Terra perform. Vanitas wasn't one for ideal chitchat. He liked to get straight to the point. Figuring out ways to shut him up were tiresome, but at least it usually wore him out enough to fall asleep.

The most productive method he'd found was to hug the boy to him. While this wasn't an act he would typically perform, he would do nearly anything to make the rambling noise stop. Ven would stop in gleeful surprise, usually lie his head upon his chest and breathe in his hearty scent. Perhaps Ventus thought the hugs meant progress, or perhaps he was overcome by the pleasantness of the situation. Vanitas was just happy to be able to sleep in peace.

Ventus also took it upon himself to shower the brunet with presents at any opportunity. As much as Ven had denied loving him, the boy was damn transparent when it came to Valentine's Day. His card was ruby red, littered with bright pink hearts, and spoke of ridiculous affection, such as how his eyes with his personal suns. This line actually made Vanitas laugh (he'd been doing that more often lately); his eyes were made for scolding not shining. It always struck him how Ven could so easily think that his negative points were actually positives. Vanitas assured himself that he must be blind with love. Of course he was still baffled by how the boy had fallen for him in the first place.

For Christmas the blond gave him a gaudy grey sweater with a large smiling reindeer head on the front.

"Do you expect me to wear this?" he asked, a mild look of disgust on his face.

"Of course!"

Growling, he let the blond push it past his head and over his torso. Ven backed up to admire his work and set upon gushing about how cute he was. Surprisingly this made Vanitas' chest warm. Somehow seeing the blond so happy with something so mundane woke something within him. It wasn't love (it couldn't be), but it was foreign. It was warm and almost overwhelming in its whispers to not only possess the boy but to actually embrace him.

Ven gasped in shock when Vanitas gave up the struggle following through with these veracious desires. The brunet held him so tightly that they slid down a bit so that they were more laying than sitting.

The noise of Aqua clearing her throat sounded loud to Vanitas' tunneled focus. "We'll just leave you two alone then." He could hear Terra protesting weakly before the door closed.

Ven brought a hand up to cup his cheek as he studied his face. "Finally satisfied?"

"No." Ven frowned as if someone had shoved a cookie in his face only to throw it in the trash. "We still have a lot left to do."

Ven's mouth drop a fraction. "How am I supposed to take that?" he asked with narrowed eyes.

"I may be happy. Just a little bit."

"Haha! I told you that I could do it!" He kissed him not even resisting when the brunet heated it with tongue and teeth.

A scowling and uncomfortable-looking Vanitas held out a poorly wrapped package the day of their joint birthday.

Taking the package with a smile, Ventus unwrapped it carefully. What he saw inside was a tiny bean sprout.

"I thought we could plant it…together." He wouldn't meet his eyes, but Ventus found the exchange adorable. Regardless of whether he had meant it in this way or not, Ven compared the sprout to their relationship. They could grow it together over time. The boy fought the urge to hug him and tell him how soft he was becoming. His own present must come first.

"Here you go," he announced holding out the neatly wrapped gift.

Unlike him, Vanitas ripped through the balloon patterned fabric recklessly. When the gift was fully revealed he started at it in disbelieve making Ventus giggle.

"Thought this might help you _open up _a bit."

His expression changed from disbelieve to irritation in a split second. The book balancing precariously on his lap read _How to Express Your Love in 10 Simple Steps_.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Sure. Just like I definitely don't love you either~."

Vanitas leaned in allowing the book to drop to the floor unnoticed. "I bite, you know?" he threatened barring his unnaturally shiny teeth.

"Go ahead," Ven said with a wink.

Vanitas grunted at his chipper attitude, but obliged biting along his jugular. Ventus tilted his head giving him easier access and curled his fingers into his dark hair. Ven shifted as tiny spurts of pleasure ran all the way to his groin.

When Vanitas pulled away he looked decidedly less angry. "Happy birthday," he whispered.

"Happy birthday." Ventus smiled before giving him a sloppy kiss.


	18. Sugar Cinnamon (Kairi)

Title: Sugar Cinnamon

Song: Radio by Lana Del Rey

Kairi-Focused

Characters: Kairi, Sora, Riku

Pairing: Riku/Sora/Kairi

Rating: T

**AN: So, this was originally going to be plain Sokai, but the Riku/Kairi conversation popped in my mind, and that changed everything XD. Because of this the first two scene feel a bit disjointed since it had a different mood to it. I almost thought of separating them into two different stories, but they still went hand-in-hand , so I left it.**

"Sora!" Kairi yelled once he had off the gummi ship. They had been apart for so long and she'd worried about him every moment, but none of that mattered anymore because here he was safe and sound in her arms. Tears fell from her eyes unnoticed.

He patted her back gently. "It's okay now," he whispered trying to calm her relieved shuddering.

"You're back for good, right?" She looked on the tipping point between breaking and mending.

"Yes." Her face lit up as all apprehensions drifted away. There was nothing left in her stance except radiating love. She pecked him on the lips, entwined her arm in his and began to lead him toward town. Sora was surprised to say the least, but he let her follow him silently, content to know that their feelings were mutual.

"Do you know what it was like being here all alone with you out there in danger, though? It was horrible." She made a pained face. "What if you had died?"

He pulled her up atop his chest in a half-hug. "But I didn't. And if I had I'm sure you would have brought me back somehow. You did it when I was a heartless, remember?"

Even though the topic was serious she let out a light giggle. "You make it sound like I'm all important or something."

He lifted her chin examining her face straight-on. "You are."

Her belly swelled with warm at the statement, and she kissed him for the umpteenth time that day. His hands caressed her thin tank top which was slowly riding up.

"Sora." It sounded breathy and foreign to her ears.

She touched one of the hands and guided it underneath the fabric. It was slightly cold and sent a chill up her spine as it caressed the skin there.

Continuing the exploration he used his other hand to brush her banes aside. "Your skin is so soft."

She blushed before sliding her hands under his shirt in turn. She felt along the bumps and ridges that defined his abs. She had never touched them this directly before, but she suspected that they were quite more defined than before he'd left. Apparently battles to the death took more effort than simple sparing matches. Her relief stirred again.

"I'm just so glad that you are safe. I'm never letting you disappear again." Her arms circled his wrist clinging tightly. "I don't care if the worlds are in danger or not, you are taking me with you!"

"Shh," he breathed into her hair while petting the back of it. "How about I start teaching you some fighting basics tomorrow?"

"Really?" He nodded, and Kairi kissed him yet again.

Kairi set the mixing bowl down at the sound of knocking. When she opened the door she was pleasantly surprised to see Riku there.

"Yo. Heard Sora moved in here with you."

She beamed giving him a crushing hug. "Get in here, you." She closed the door and literally pushed the older man to the sofa. "Yep. Want some breakfast? I was just making eggs," she offered as she headed back over to the stove.

"Naw, I'm good. Sora here?" He called over his shoulder.

"No. He needed to go buy some essentials. You know a new toothbrush, deodorant and stuff. Apparently my apple blossom scents are too girly for him."

They both laughed at this before the conversation died to the swift beating sound of a fork swirling yoke. "So, uh, you back at your parents?"

"Yeah." He seemed uncomfortable. Kairi frowned. "Not much else I can do until I find a new place."

"You could always stay here."

Riku raised an eyebrow at her generosity. "Thanks, but I'd rather get my own place. Freedom and all that, you know." He strained a laugh.

She turned from the now sizzling egg to give him a look. "I meant until you find a new place, but, yeah, the door's always open to you." She smiled softly pushing off the odd vibe he was releasing.

"Thanks. I'm okay. I haven't seen them in years. The least I can do is put up with them for a few weeks."

Kairi finished her egg, and came over to sit next to him on the sofa.

"You seem really happy," Riku observed.

"Should I not be?"

"No. I just thought…I'm glad for you."

She gave him a questioning look. "Are you not happy, Riku?"

"Huh?" He jerked. "No. Uh, maybe not the happiest that I could be, but yeah, sure I'm happy." Kairi frowned once more, not fully believing him. A hunch she'd had for quite a while was calling to her again.

"We just need to find you a little lady of your own," she teased knocking her shoulder against his.

His eyes widened. "You should worry less about my love life and more about your egg that's getting cold."

She huffed but complied eating the egg quickly. "You don't like me, do you?" She mocked inhaled in surprise and gave him a dismayed expression.

"Of course not. You're taken." His brows furrowed.

"You're so serious today. I wasn't trying to imply you would try to break anyone up, but you can't choose who you love, you know?"

"I know that! Just lay off the topic, okay? What are you doing now?"

"I taking classes in photography. What with having my memory disrupted and you two disappearing, I decided that I'd like to document life."

"Wow, that's kind of deep."

"You don't have to sound so surprised. What about you? Going to college?"

"You do realize I haven't even graduated high school yet?"

"Then you better get on that, slacker." She flashed a brilliant smile.

He smiled back. "Tutor me then."

"I charge a high price."

"Don't I get compensation for saving the worlds?"

"Okay." She paused putting her index finger to her chin in contemplation. "One free lesson."

He smacked her in the arm. "Cheap. What's the going rate anyway?"

"Hugs," she said triumphantly.

"Eww, I'll die of cooties," he joked.

"Whatever you say, Ri~ku," she chirped, the brilliant smile on her face unwavering.

"You've really become a Mary Sue."

"I don't think Sora would say that." She waggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"Eww. I don't want to think about you two…you know."

"Too bad. I was thinking of inviting you to join us." His eyes widened. "Calm down. I'm just kidding."

Riku visibly relaxed before smacking her in the arm again, spurring a round of giggles. "You shouldn't joke about stuff like that." His mouth squeezed into a tight line. "Sora might not like it."

"I doubt that's a problem." She waved her hand dismissively.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Oh nothing~" There was a gleam in her eyes that made him gulp.

"So, I asked Riku if he wanted to join us in bed today," Kairi said crawling under the covers on her side of the bed.

"You're bold."

"He turned us down on account of thinking that _you _would mind."

"Really?" Sora's voice was weak.

"Oh, come on. You can't blame him for not noticing can you? If it bothers you, just go talk to him."

"I don't know. I don't want him to hate me or something."

She placed her hand over his squeezing softly. "He could never hate you. Neither could I."

He met her eyes which shined with reassurance. "Thanks, Kairi."

"Of course."

"Ri~ku," she sang into the telephone. "I don't have any classes today. You should come over. Tutoring and all." And all. She twirled the cord around her finger.

"I guess. How does 2 sound?"

"Sure. See you soon." She hung up and was surprised to see Sora behind her.

"What was that about?" he asked.

"Invited Riku over."

Sora's expression was hard to read. He seemed caught between being upset and pleased.

"Don't worry. I won't make you talk about anything you don't want to." But that didn't mean that she wouldn't.

The two young men sat a comfortable distance away from each other on the sofa while Kairi glared down at them.

"Talk," she ordered pointing a finger. They had been like this for a half an hour. "Seriously, what is with you two." Actually, she could guess. But still.

"Hi," Riku mumbled awkwardly.

Kairi smacked her forehead. This was hopeless.

"We are dealing with this situation now. If you won't talk I will." Both young men gaped at her. She just shifted her hips which were covered by her hands. "Riku, Sora likes you. Sora, I _think_ that Riku likes you." The second sentence sounded strained with uncertainty.

Sora sighed in relief while Riku started at the man in astonishment.

"Is that really true?" Riku asked.

"Yes. I wasn't trying to hide it exactly. I just didn't want you to hate me."

"Hate you? How could I hate you? Sora, I love you." The confession slipped from his mouth before he knew it. "Shit."

"Silly, what's the matter?" Sora placed a hand on the older man's thigh.

Riku looked up into Kairi's eyes who were surprisingly gentle. "You already chose Kairi."

"Is that all?" Riku's eyes widened again by Sora's carefree attitude.

"Is that all? What are you saying Sora? That you would just throw Kairi aside for me? Don't you think that's a little unfair?" His voice was passionate.

"I didn't say that." Sora's eyes narrowed at the accusation.

"And you, Kairi, why the hell are you so quite about this? Aren't you surprised? Upset?"

"Why would I be? I was the one who forced you to talk remember? Seriously, Riku just pretend I'm not here if that helps."

"You good now, cause I've been waiting long enough to do this," Sora said before pulling him into a heavy kiss. Despite his qualms about the situation Riku leaned into it, meshing their chests. The sound of clapping broke them apart.

Riku's eyebrow twitched. "K, Kairi, spill. What is really going on here."

"In a minute. First I want you to answer something." She bounced over, leaning in close to his face. Today was turning out to be quite fun. "Why would you care so much about my feelings when Sora is right here giving himself to you on a silver platter? Hmm?" She smirked at the redness touching his face.

"You're my friend." He looked away.

"Come now, Riku. Can't we all be honest?"

"I care about you," he mumbled still not meeting her intimidating eyes.

"What was that? I couldn't quite hear you."

Full annoyance was in his voice now. "I like you okay! I know it doesn't make sense, but I do! I like both of you!"

"Good boy," she praised patting him softly on the head. "Here's a reward." She kissed him on her knees in-between his outstretched legs. Sora gave them the time, and she was grateful. Teasing Riku was fun, but they didn't want to give him a heart attack. She broke away slowly staring into his half-lidded eyes. She crawled the few inches to the end of the couch.

"Scooch," she ordered Sora, who complied, squeezing himself next to Riku so that she could sit at the end.

Riku sat there in silence for a long time before finally speaking. "When you offed for me to join you two you weren't joking."

"Nope~" she chirped hugging Sora's arm.

Slowly, Riku mirrored Kairi's actions hugging onto Sora's opposite arm. Sora sighed happily tugging them even closer to him. "So, Kairi told me you were looking for someplace to stay."

"Not anymore."


	19. Best Friends (Saix)

Title: Best Friends

Song: Prelude 12/21 by AFI

Characters: Saix/Isa, Axel/Lea, mentions of Roxas

Implied pairing: Lea/Isa

Saix-Focused

**AN: **I was going to use Saix's quote "Which would you rather suffer the loss of, some make-believe friendship, or a real one?" in reference to his and Axel's friendship, but I read in a forum that this is a false interpretation based on the mistranslation in the English version. That quote is actually meant to be telling Axel to choose between Roxas and Xion. I still like the quote though, so I've recycled it XD

I know it has been a while, but know that I still have 16 ideas for this. I just have to actually write them lol.

"_Hey, Isa, I've been meaning to tell you something for a while now."_

"_Yeah, well what is it?" he asked with feigned disinterested, his friend had kept him waiting after all._

"_We're best friends, right?"_

"_Don't be stupid. Of course we are."_

_The redhead put his hands behind his head nonchalantly. "So, we'll be best friends forever?"_

"_I can't say, but it would be nice if that were true."_

_Lea smiled broadly. "Then it's settled. We will, 'cause I'm never giving up on us. You and me forever."_

"_Hmm forever is a long time. I'm not sure that I can put up with you that long."_

"_Hey! That's not nice!" Lea mock whined flinging his arm around his shoulder. "Just for that, I'll never leave your side. Got it memorized?"_

Saix is a Nobody; He doesn't feel, but he remembers, and remembrance carries emotions whether you can really feel them or not. He remembers Lea's friendship, and that makes not being Axel's that much harder. It wasn't always like this.

When they first joined the Organization they had acted close, not like they used to of course—they are Nobodies—but there had been effort. But that effort hadn't seemed to pay off. Eventually the effort didn't seem worth it anymore. Thus, they kept a comfortable distance from each other. Things were just easier that way.

This is what upsets him the most about Axel's and Roxas' friendship. It had formed entirely out of a Nobody's existence while their real one couldn't hold out. Axel is so good at pretending to be happy when he is around Roxas; he'd never been that damn close to real emotion around him.

He leaves them alone for a time for multiple reasons: it keeps Number XIII preoccupied and unsuspicious, Axel wouldn't be hanging around him anyway, and (though he scorns the fact) he likes seeing Axel that "happy." But after a while, it begins to gnaw at the hole in his chest. Roxas is unlike the others. He is too similar to Sora; he seems to have real feelings. Saix knows it is ridiculous, but the memory of jealousy raises its head in him.

For illogical reasons, he confronts Axel on the matter, acutely aware of the redhead's unpleasant expression—he never smiles for him, not any more—.

"You wanted something?" he asks, mind obviously somewhere else.

"What is it you have between yourself and number XIII?"

His brow furrows, apparently unnerved by his sudden interest. "We're friends." He speaks the words as if they are obvious.

Saix feels the memory of emotion relax for reasons he refuses to dwell on. "I do not feel it is my place to tell you who or who not to associate with, but I do not think it is healthy to spend so much time together."

"Why? Because he is just your pawn?" He sounds angry.

"No. Let me put it this way, would you rather lose a make-believe friendship or a real one?"

His brow furrowed further. "I don't-"

Saix isn't sure where his mind has disappeared to, for he never meant to say, "You are slipping away from me, Lea."

The furrow disappears replaced by understanding. "Saix…no, Isa." He reaches out touching Saix's shoulder. "I've missed you too."

"No you haven't." The memory of anger is there now, forcing him to shove the comforting hand aside.

"Yes I have." The words are genuine.

"You are fine with my replacement."

"Is that what you think?"

He flares his hands. "What am I supposed to think? You gave up first."

Axel's head falls. "It was too painful."

"What?"

"What we feel now, it's only imitation. It was too difficult being with you, feeling a cheap imitation when I could remember the real thing."

"So, you didn't pick Roxas over me" Saix's face is blank incredulity, but it isn't the unfeeling mask he often presents to the world.

Axel laughs. He _laughs_, and Saix is ready to set a Claymore to his throat, when he says, "Of course not. I like Roxas, but you will always be my best friend, Isa."

"Lea." He may have cried if he'd had a heart, but then again, maybe he wouldn't have. What he does do is touch Axel's shoulder mirroring the redhead's earlier gesture. "You and me forever, right?" And Axel smiles like he usually only gives to Roxas.


	20. Heart's Desire (Xion)

Title: Heart's Desire

Song: Stargazing by Delerium

Xion-Focused

Characters: Xion, Roxas

Pairing: Roxas/Xion

Rating:

A hooded Xion snuck up to a preoccupied Roxas and sat upon the ledge next to him.

Startled, he yelled her name. She might have laughed if the situation wasn't so grave. Instead, she handed him an ice cream.

He thanked her, and she could tell that he was trying to pretend that everything was normal, as if they weren't both traitors, two sides of the same coin waiting for one or the other to disappear.

As he began to eat, she addressed him, voice trembling, "Roxas, I'm out of time." She stood, and he finally looked her way. It is better to show than to tell, so she pulled the hood back, visibly displaying that there was no turning back now. His eyes widened in shock, and her arms fell back down to her sides. "Even if I'm not ready, I have to make this choice. You have poured so many memories into me, given me so much," her hands cupped the air as if holding something precious, "that I feel like I'm about to overflow." Her hands clenched near where her heart would be. "Look at me, Roxas. Who do you see? If you see somebody else's face…a boy's face…then that means I'm almost ready. This puppet will have to play her part. Roxas, this is him. It's Sora."

Roxas released a confused groan, then another of worry as she began to walk on the air beyond the Clock Tower's ledge. She hoped that he was frightened. That would make this easier. When she turned, hood back in place to shield the foreign face, he was standing. Raising a hand, she pointed it at him. "You're next, Roxas. I have to make you a part of me too. Don't you see?" She clenched her fist, both as an act of aggression and to quell her own desperation. Purple energy surrounding her amplified her voice, and she hoped that it sounded convincing. "This is why I was created."

At first he refused to fight, pleading with her that this wasn't her. Of course not. She was kind and selfless, and that was exactly why she was being like this. It was the only way, couldn't he see that? Of course not. He was in the dark, she knew that. He didn't even know who Sora was. He was blissfully ignorant, and that made her happy. After this, he could be peacefully happy for a bit longer, right? That was all she wanted. They would both be lost eventually, so he deserved the longer happiness. She shouldn't have existed anyway.

But he didn't make it easy. He told her about his wish to be friends forever. _Shut up!_ This was already hard enough without her having to fight back the tears that wanted to see the light of day—the last day. She had dreamed of a similar life, laughing and eating ice cream until the end of time. That would be the perfect life. She wanted was friends and happiness. But that wasn't for her or Roxas; that was the hard truth, but at least she could help him live in that ignorance for that much longer.

After enough close calls and false evil laughs, he fought back, strength equal to her own. She used her full strength—it wouldn't do for him to figure out that this was a ruse—until falling for an attack she could have easily blocked. She collapsed to her knees, strength fading. Her dark energy drifted away in a wave around her. Roxas clutched his heart giving her an unsure look.

"Who are you…again?" he asked, and the words pierced her heart, but she smiled nonetheless. She succeeded. He would be alright. She felt sleepy, so she let her eyes flutter.

"It's weird. I feel like I'm forgetting something really important." His voice drifts to her ears, and the words sound somewhat muffled, as if she were under water.

"You'll be…better off now…Roxas." She fell, not having enough strength to even support herself. His arms catch her without a thought. She heard a twinkling sound, but she didn't bother giving it thought. His arms were much more important.

"Am I…the one who did this to you?" His eyes are filled with hurt.

She shook her head, insistent on his happiness even now. "No…It was my choice to go away now. Better that than to do nothing and let Xemnas have his way. I belong with Sora. And now, I am going back…to be with him. Roxas…" Her hand reached for the one upon her shoulder, fingering it gently. "I need you…to do me a favor. All those hearts that I've captured…Kingdom Hearts…Set them free."

"Kingdom Hearts…Free them?"

She could feel her legs crystalizing and knew that she didn't have much time left. "It's too late for me to undue my mistakes. But you can't let Xemnas have Kingdom Hearts. You can't. Goodbye, Roxas. See you again. I'm glad…I got to meet you. Oh, and of course, Axel, too. You're both my best friends. Never forget." The words tasted biter with the irony. He had already forgotten. But she couldn't help trying what she could to live on. Somehow. She brought her hand up to cup his cheek. He looked close to tears already, and she was touched that enough of him still remembered her enough for that.

All energy that she had left sept away causing her hand to fall limp. "No!" was the last thing she heard, and his voice sounded like peace to her ears.


	21. Painting with Red (Roxas)

Title: Painting with Red

Song:I Never Knew What Love Meant by Rin'

Roxas-centered

Pairing: Roxas/Xion

Characters: Roxas, Xion, mentions of Sora and Axel

Rating: K

**AN: **This turned out really short, but hey, it's sweet.

Roxas closed his eyes willing his existence to fade to where it belonged. He expected his consciousness to dissolve into Sora's. He expected to cease to exist, or at least to meet endless darkness. He had not expected to see a small, black-haired girl whose memory had been lost to him until that instant. Before he had time to process the influx of memories, wet streaks rested upon his cheeks. "Xion," he whispered tentatively, as if she were a figment of his imagination that might vanish any moment.

"Roxas, I've missed you," she said in a voice as sweet as honey.

"How is this even possible? I thought you-that I-"

"Would dissolved? I thought so too. But Sora is so selfless that he allows us to remain even though he's unaware of doing so."

"Xion," and his voice was broken, reflecting his still mending equanimity.

"Shh," she cooed approaching him and cuddling him against her. She pet his head as he breathed raggedly into her shoulder. "Everything is fine now. We're fine."

When he'd finally calmed himself, they sat down amid the open darkness, and he leaned his head upon her shoulder without a thought, making her sigh contentedly. "I never dreamed that we could be together like this. It is almost like heaven. Axel always said that only Somebodies got that, though."

"Yeah. Guess we owe that to Sora. He's not the typical Somebody."

"Yeah." They were quiet for a time. "This would be even better if we had some ice cream and a sunset to watch."

"I wonder." She groaned in effort, making him lift his head to stare at her. Her eyes were clenched.

"What are you doing?"

"Seeing if we can make it happen," she said in a voice implying that it should have been obvious.

He chuckled, and she narrowed her eyes at him. "You were the one asking for it." Then she smiled, shoved his side. "Help me!"

He gasped, but did, closing his eyes and visualizing the brilliant view atop the grand clock tower. This was an easy task since all his best memories had occurred there. Stark purples and pinks, vivid oranges and yellow, and plenty of vibrant red. He loved the color red. Somehow it made his chest warm. What had Axel said about it that one time? That it was the color that travels the farthest?

After what felt like a long time, Xion was shaking him. "Look!" When he opened his eyes, there it was, the exact sunset he had been envisioning—with plenty of red. "This really is heaven," Xion murmured, placing her head on his shoulder this time.

"I wish Axel could share this with us."

"Yeah." There was a pause. "Do you remember what he said that one time about love?"

"That it is something you feel for another person. It's like friendship, but different. That it's something you can't explain to someone else. It's just something you know when you've found it."

She gasped. "Wow, that's almost what he said exactly! I thought you had a bad memory, Roxas." She giggled.

"Hey!" He smacked her arm. "That wasn't my fault!"

"I know. I know." She chuckled a few more times. "I still don't really understand it."

"I think I do."

She cocked her head. "You do?"

"The color red."

"Hmm?"

"I think it's the same as the feeling I get from the color red."

"Hmm." She pondered this, staring at the vibrant red surrounding them. Then she started. "Roxas?"

"Yeah?"

"I think I might love you."

"Yeah. I think I love you too."


	22. Chasing You (Rokunami)

Song: Carousel by Melanie Martinez

Rating: General

Pairing: Roxas/Namine

Namine-centric

* * *

It didn't take Namine long to realize she was unlike other Nobodies. Nobodies weren't supposed to have feelings, but sometimes when she closed her eyes and focused really hard they were there, off at the edges of her being, but still there. They seeped in closer to her core when Kairi reawakened, as if her feelings were trickling to her. The strongest emotion was loneliness. This was her drive, her purpose. She drew because when she looked at her drawings she could delude herself that the illustrated people were friends who could keep her company.

Things might have been better if the Organization recruited her instead of restricting her within a castle of blank white space. (That was another reason she drew; to add color to the bleak world she lived in). She might have met Roxas sooner if she had, but then again, she might have lost herself to the Organization's plans as well.

Sora and his memories were what got her through her days. She knew him better than anyone, and it didn't take her long to fall head-first. So when Roxas sprang into existence, a Nobody as uncommon as she was, she of course perked up.

Instead of going to meet him, she observed. Her boring day-to-day life left her plenty of time to examine him. It was interesting to examine just what separated him from Sora. And surprisingly there was a lot.

She loved Sora's selflessness, his generosity, and purity, but Roxas contained all these traits as well, just in different ways. She began to realize that she had only loved Sora because he was the first person she really knew. What set Roxas apart was his complexity, so similar to her own. Sora was extremely simple in many regards. Every action he took was selfless-from rushing off to help the worlds to ripping his very heart out. But Roxas, he was selfless in a different way. He asked questions but didn't delve too far, and he didn't think about the possible consequences of his actions. He listened to the orders of his confinement, just like she did, while Sora challenged authority when he knew it was wrong. Sora went as far as fighting his own friend to protect the justice he valued, while Roxas only did that when no other options were left to him.

When Roxas first appeared it was when Sora had become a heartless, so Roxas was all that she had left of him. Of course she was upset about Sora, but Roxas felt like a piece of Sora that she could still hold onto. Her interest was already bound to him by the time Sora had reverted to his human form. Regardless, when Sora showed up right in front of her, her expectations grew. Even if she had already gained feelings for Roxas by that point (which she wasn't even sure if she had or not) he had been unreachable while Sora was there just in front of her fingertips.

She obeyed orders with a selfish feeling of accomplishment as Kairi's essence was replaced with her own. But she soon realized that even without remembering Kairi, he would never truly be hers. To keep him she would have to fulfill the role that she had already set, meaning that she could never be herself. As much as it hurt, she let him go.

It was then, working with his beautiful memories, that she realized that Sora's memories could not be fully restored as long as Roxas still existed. Pushing the thought aside, she focused solely on restoring what she could. But, when Riku and DiZ invaded her little mock-home, it couldn't be put off any longer.

Neither were immediately harsh about the decision. Perhaps they knew her feelings. Perhaps they were just kind enough not to steal Roxas' life immediately. Either way, they placed him in the fake Twilight Town, giving him a peaceful, almost perfect, limited existence.

Again she only watched him, but this time is was because of the watchful eye of Diz who forbade her interference. With each day Roxas' remaining time shortened, and she couldn't hold back her longing to meet with him anymore. She was done with being used and controlled. It was only thanks to her power that Sora could wake up, so she had every right to see Roxas before he did.

His Twilight Town was nothing more than digitized brain waves, so it was easy enough to stop time. In that frozen moment it was just the two of them, and she could feel what she had of a heart reaching out toward his. There was surprise in his eyes at her sudden appearance, and he nearly stumbled into her, but he was beautiful in that moment, in that time of freedom. He wasn't worrying about Heartless or Nobodies, lost hearts or loneliness. He had everything he wanted in that digital reality, and in that moment she wanted nothing more than to stay there with him.

She smiled, and it was the most genuine smile she had yet to smile. He wanted to know what was going on—and she couldn't blame him—but she also couldn't bring herself to disrupt the beautiful moment, not when it would end in mere days anyway. Holding up her hand, she told him her simple truth: that she had wanted to meet him, if only once. Then with the rippling of time, she faded away from his consciousness as mysteriously as she came.

She truly would have been content with that—or so she told herself—but Roxas was growing closer to where Sora was with each passing day. The keyblade was reaching him and so were the dusks. He deserved to know what was happening to him. Deserved truth in his final hours after living a life riddled with lies.

She entered his mind, a simple task for a memory witch such as herself. The world was white (white like the castle, white like a memory). Her words were cut off by Riku grabbing her wrist. He said that Roxas would be better off without the knowledge. And maybe he would. Maybe knowing would only open up the wounds his life in Twilight Town healed. But was it really their right to decide what was best for him?

More days passed, and the decision to tell him seemed inevitable. He was unstable, shaken to his very core by Axel's arrival. He was losing himself. Losing himself to a life he no longer remembered. Losing himself to Sora. She wanted to save him, wanted to save him so badly. But she didn't know what to do. Sora was important, so very important to the cause of Light, and Diz would never allow it. If she couldn't save him, she could at least help him.

She called him into her room, the one which connected Castle Oblivion and the Old Mansion in the hopes that it would be more difficult for Diz to find them there. Decorating her walls were drawings of his memories, drawings that might jog his suppressed memory.

She told him about his connection to Sora, about his friendship with Axel, about the Organization, about his fate. "You were never supposed to exist," she said without any emotion whatsoever, not because the words held no meaning but that they were true and something ground into her since her creation. Realizing his reaction made more sense than her own detached one, she said simply, "I guess some things really are better left unsaid." Because of this, she did not tell him he was important, his own person, or worthy of his own life, even though she believed all these things. What she did tell him was that he would be whole, complete at last, once he fused with Sora. And that they would meet again.

Now they have been reunited, though they are still apart. Like being on a spinning contraption they spin in circles, searching for that tiny window of opportunity offered to them to glimpse each other. This doesn't bother Namine, though, for her life has always felt like a carousel regardless of how much time she spent standing still. She is used to not making any progress, so she tells herself it is okay when the only contact she has with Roxas is through Sora and Kairi. She may be stuck in one place, her world might be spinning, but he is there. She's no longer lonely and that is enough.


	23. Losing Control (Ventus-Vanitas)

Song: Lose Control by Evanescence

Rating: Teen/Mature (warnings: depictions of violence with light gore, character death)

Ventus-Vanitas-centric

* * *

Merging with Vanitas was not what he had expected. Instead of entering his body as a foreign entity in pursuit of taking him over, Vanitas _merged _with him. He could feel darkness coiling within him, spreading through his veins. Memories and thoughts of Vanitas mingled with his own, and he could feel his very being reshaping itself back into a semblance of the person he used to be. He had been immersed in darkness for so long that the part of him that was Vanitas longed for it. He wanted to keep it, use it, _create _it. That part of him that remained Ventus knew that darkness was dangerous and that he shouldn't give up his light, but the darkness was quite persuading. It whispered seductively into the ear of his mind of power, of pleasure that the light could never offer. What light remained was soon quenched to a small contained substance. Ventus breathed in the feeling of power which circulated his body and felt the stirring of a devilish grin. It was satisfying.

He scanned the horizon spotting Aqua, who was staring at him in disbelief, Master Xehanort, who was still engaging Terra, and the X-blade, which now rested in his palm. In his reforming he had nearly forgotten that this had been the entire purpose of it. The keyblade was heavier than other keyblades he'd wielded, as if the magnitude of its power had solidified the very substance. His devilish grin widened, if that was even possible. As the amnesiac Ventus his life had been contrasted by constant rules. Now everything about the situation was liberating. No one could hold him back now—even though Master Xehanort would try—not darkness and not light. The X-blade was the perfect mixture of both, and it granted him perfect manipulation of both.

He could still remember Aqua and her kindness, but he also remembered how she had looked down on him, as if he were a helpless child, and right now the yearning to fight, to test his new strength, gnawed at him like a shark ripping at his side. So, he spread his legs and raised the keyblade high above his head. In response, her face jolted and she readied herself, apparently able to detect that he wasn't the same Ven that she knew anymore. Maybe this fight would be worth a challenge.

She stood waiting, probably still hesitant to hurt her friend. He sneered before releasing a blast of dark energy. She blocked the blast, but the impact caused her to skid backwards.

"Ven, are you still in there?" Her voice was sad and anxious.

"What are you talking about? I _am_ Ventus. You don't recognize me?" his mocked, voice heavy with scorn.

She cringed. "Ven, please don't do this."

He cackled, feeling it bubble in his throat like a carbonated beverage. He lounged, keyblade ricocheting off hers. "Oh, I will. And I will enjoy every moment of it."

Aqua's face tightened, first in sorrow then in resignation. Without a word, she ground her feet into the dirt, pushing forward with momentum. Pushed back, he held his stance before throwing all his force to the side, knocking the woman to the ground. She flipped up, charging at him with an overhead strike. Before the strike could land, he hit her with a bombardment of dark energy. Purple-black surged from her in dust clouds as she hacked. Forcing herself up, she spun in a circle, but Ventus did a backflip out of the way.

"You may be fast, but you still won't hit me." Teleporting behind her, he struck forward with the X-blade, infusing it with dark energy. It hit her square in the back, the energy sizzling across her skin like lightning. She cried out, a splash of blood shooting from her gaping mouth. Before she had a chance to recover, Ven blasted her in the same spot with a barrage of fireballs. Now charred and covered in red, her back was beyond repair.

She crumpled forward, eyes looking hazy. "Ven," she murmured on tired lips.

Smirking down at her, Ven raised the X-blade and slashed downward like an axe into a log. She screamed at each blow, blood soon splattering. Breaking a second, he leaned down to dip a finger in the warm substance. It was thick and sticky. Licking at it, something in him snapped. With further enthusiasm he struck her, again and again, until blood littered the ground and her skin was bruised and ripped. Gnashes covered her entire body and her breathing was shallow, that of someone just barely holding on.

Crouching in front of her, he gazed into her hazy stare. "You look nice like this, below me where you belong. You were such an earsore with all your talk of light and friendship. What you wanted—what we all really wanted—was power. The power I now have." He dug the heel of his shoe against her head, watching as it compressed into the earth. Blood and guts oozed, only making him grin wider.


	24. Home (Platonic Sorikai)

Title: Home

Song: Unpredictable by Skye Sweetnam

Kairi-Focused

Pairing: platonic Sorikai

* * *

"Hey guys!" Kairi called as she entered the house, quite uninvited. Riku's grunt was the only acknowledgement to her presence. "Want to go sea turtle hunting?"

Sora at least looked at her at this, but still didn't respond. Instead he reverted his attention to the television screen. Kairi stood there expectantly, but they just continued to watch their program in silence. Fed up, she began to tap her foot loudly.

"Hello, guys! Are you seriously just going to be couch potatoes from now on? Where are the fun friends I used to have? The ones who went exploring and made up elaborate stories?" She glared at them.

"Sorry, Kairi, but I think I've had enough adventures for a lifetime." To Riku's credit he did look sorry.

Crestfallen, she replied, "But I haven't."

"No one's stopping you from having adventures, Kairi," Sora said gently. "Well, except for dangerous ones," he added to her annoyance.

She audibly growled. "That's real considerate of you, Sora. Almost as considerate as you were when you two went off on _dangerous _adventures without me."

Riku looked up. "We never meant to-"

"That's not the point. Is it so hard to step into my shoes and let _me_ have some adventures for once?" She crossed her arms, sighing. "Whatever. I wasn't planning anything dangerous in the first place. I just want some excitement, you know?"

"Sorry, Kai, but we've had enough excitement for a long time."

"Yeah? Well, I've had enough sitting around doing nothing. That's all I've been doing since you guys left."

"Like I said, you can go find excitement by yourself."

"That's beside the point. I want to have excitement with you two."

"Kairi," Riku began, lifting his hand, but she interrupted.

"This whole situation is so unfair! I didn't just get left behind by you guys, but now you're not even the same people anymore."

"We're still the same," Sora argued. "We just have different wants now. A chance to catch our breath being one."

"But you've had months to catch your breath. I just want to go exploring with you two again. I want our time back." She knew she was being unreasonable, but she couldn't help it. Things couldn't just go back to the way they used to be, not even if they did go hunt turtles with her. It still wouldn't be the same.

Sora stood and laid a hand on her arm. "I get it. We've all been through so much. We really aren't the same. But, Kairi, I don't know how to make this better. We can't reverse time."

"I know." They were all silent until she smiled weakly. "Can we at least go watch the sunset together?"

The fallen tree on the play islands was further worn, with new chips and moss overrunning its northern side, but it was still fully-intact and large enough to seat the tree of them. The boys sat to either side of her, just as they used to, and if she closed her eyes, she knew it would feel just the same. The sky was turning crimson and painting the sea in a lighter strawberry shade. A salty, mild breeze blew at her hair.

"Does it still look the same? After seeing all the worlds out there, I mean."

Sora's mouth opened, but before he could say anything Riku beat him to it. "Yes. It's the same sky, the same sea, but my appreciation isn't. They're what hold this world together. They are…more beautiful to me now."

Kairi stared at him, the newfound wisdom resting in his gaze. When she turned to Sora there was a noticeable air of growth around him as well.

"Yeah. Nothing can change the view, only our perception of it. Other worlds are special in their own ways, but they will never be the same as home."

"Do you really consider the Islands home?"

"Of course," Sora answered without pause. "Why?"

She waited in case Riku would answer. When he didn't, she laid a hand on each of theirs, only smiling when they turned to her. "Because for me, you will both always be my home."


	25. Worth Dying For (Akuroku)

Title: Worth Dying For

Song: Somebody to Die For by Hurts

Pairing: Akuroku

Axel-centric

* * *

Axel glares at the offending ice cream stick. It says "winner," but all he feels like is a loser. He's lost Roxas, the first thing to actually matter to him since waking as a Nobody. He remembers caring for others, but Roxas was the closet he has gotten to actually caring. Now all there is is remorse and emptiness. His hand clenches around the wooden stick, wishing he could trade it for the only thing he really wants: Roxas.

An incomplete Kingdom Hearts stares at him through the window, a sure sign that Roxas failed. He wonders where he is and how long it will be before Xemnas orders his execution. Axel can feel a tightening in his chest at the very thought. He imagines Roxas' face twisting in painful agony, and tugs at his red hair. He can't let that happen, he can't.

Xemnas is entirely clear that his name will be the next on the chopping block if he fails to exterminate Roxas. Axel knows disobeying is stupid, but for some reason he doesn't care, not if it means he can have a bit more time with Roxas. Even if they are eliminated together by Xemnas' own hand, it will be okay as long as they are together. But Roxas doesn't make things easy. He stares at him blankly, and Axel realizes that he has been forgotten. All that time together is gone. He tries again, pleads with waving arms and a shaking voice, but this isn't his Roxas, not anymore. This is a Roxas who knows the workings of the world, yet knows nothing of what his place is in it.

Axel clutches the chest of his cloak, remembering the tightening of disappointment and loss. It is pointless to die for this Roxas, a Roxas who will only be used by those mapping out his life, a Roxas who will not even let him live on in a memory. His mouth is dry and bitter, but he summons his chakrams, their weight heavy as led in his grip.

Roxas looks at him scared before knowledge flashes. He's there, his Rox is there. His burden increases, head spinning. He's made up his mind twice, only for it to be pushed in his face. Kill and be spared or spare and be killed together. The answer is obvious, but not simple by any means.

"Sorry," he says, voice harsh out of necessity. If he dares give in, he knows he won't go through with it. Anger flares in Roxas' eyes—he remembers that anger. He strikes, dancing eloquently blow for blow, but all his nerve endings are screaming to hold him in a still embrace. He wavers, no heart in it. Panting and bruised, he cedes, creates a dark pathway and leaves.

He doesn't return to headquarters; he can't. He's already failed in his mission, and now he has nothing to show for it aside from an emptiness threatening to eat him whole. Roxas' smiling face flashes in his mind. He may have nothing to show for it, but Roxas is alive. Roxas may still be smiling. But he knows it is only a matter of time. Xemnas will never let him rest, and neither will Riku or Namine. He's the only one Roxas has, even if he no longer wants him.

Roxas chose to merge with Sora, and Axel waited out of curtesy of his wishes, but he can hardly stand by that decision. It is unfair to both of them, and so he decides he will give Roxas the life he deserves even if it kills him. That is the least he can do to make it up to him, to preserve that innocent smile that was so easily replaced with anger. Besides, he has realized in his absence that life without him is devoid of meaning.

So he kidnaps Kairi to lure Sora to him. Then he would extract Sora's heart once again, separating Roxas. Kairi could then return Sora to normal. No one would be hurt. Roxas could hardly blame him for such actions. But things don't go as planned. Saix is there, and he is forced to flee, leaving Kairi in his villainous hands. Then he meets Sora in Betwixt and Between. Sora who shines Roxas' light. Sora who is the center of everything and who Roxas chose. He's cornered by dusks, and Axel's only option becomes ultimately clear. Living without Roxas would be difficult but dying for him would be simple. Actually, it would be the simplest thing he had done in this life or the last.

Sora asks what he is planning, but he doesn't answer, just lets his internal flames flare, feeling the heat burning him from the inside out. He falls to the ground, and Sora is there, his face concerned and showing Roxas in every feature. Axel smiles, feels a sense of ease overtake him, the first since the day Roxas left. Sora asks what he was trying to do, and he answers. He wanted to see Roxas. He was all he ever needed. All that ever mattered.

Axel closes his eyes, feeling his body disintegrating back into darkness when a voice reaches him. It can't be Roxas, it can't. But it sounds like him, and that is all that matters to his fading consciousness.

"Stupid. You're leaving me, too?"

"Life just wasn't the same without you. No feeling to it."

He hears a chuckle. "I appreciate what you were trying to do." There is a pause, and Axel thinks he's done, that he will fade out in silence now, but then he says, "I won't forget you. Promise."

Just before he disappears entirely, Axel feels the warmth of a tear on his cheek.


End file.
